


You Are The Music In Me

by jewelsbrooke, thetranquilteal (dragonBug27)



Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crossover, F/M, High School Musical - Freeform, Inverness, North High School, Not just another high school au, Scotland, Slow Burn, The one where Mrs. Fitz is a meddling old besum, and we love her for it, we promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-20
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-06-30 03:27:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 36,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15743286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jewelsbrooke/pseuds/jewelsbrooke, https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonBug27/pseuds/thetranquilteal
Summary: Whilst on vacation, 17-year-old Claire Beauchamp finds herself onstage singing karaoke with none other than North High School’s all-star athlete Jamie Fraser. After a night filled with fun and laughter, the two make plans to meet at their shared school when the holidays are over. But fate intervenes and Jamie is left standing alone on the steps wondering what happened. 15 years later, Claire finally returns to North High School and discovers that some things never change - including her connection to Jamie Fraser.Inspired by the Disney Channel movie High School Musical.





	1. When There Was Me And You

Claire Beauchamp just wanted some peace and quiet, a place where she could be alone with her thoughts. More specifically, she wanted to finish reading her book without the sounds of immature adolescents all around her. They may have been the same age as her that didn’t mean she had any patience for their gossiping and mucking around. If she heard one more person challenge someone else to an arm wrestle she might scream.

Her searching finally lead her to the banquet hall. It was blissfully empty with everyone too concerned with ringing in the New Year. Fireworks were already being shot off to entertain the younger children and she could hear the excited crowds outside, but it didn’t matter, it was all background noise to her.   


“Claire! Claire, are you in here?” At the sound of her mother’s voice, Claire slid further down into the corner she had situated herself. “Claire Beauchamp, if you are in here you had better answer me!”   


“Okay, okay, Mum. I’m here! Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, give a girl a break!” Couldn’t she read even  _ one _ chapter in peace?   


“Oh please, Claire, language!” Her mother tutted as she walked into the hall, her many gold bangles jingling with every step. “You know your father and I don’t like it when you use that phrase.”   


“But I learned it from you!”   


“Well,” her mother huffed, “even so, young lady, watch your mouth, hmm? And what are you doing in here? You should be with the other children your age, enjoying the party and the fireworks!”   


“They are all so loud and obnoxious. Besides,” Claire held her book up in the air and waved it a little, “I’d rather finish the book I’m reading.”   


“You have plenty of time to finish that on the plane ride home,” Claire groaned internally as her mother took the book out of her hand and closed it without even using the bookmark. “Off now, off you go! Go have fun for once, instead of being so serious and concentrating on your studies.”

Her mother paused and looked down at her for a moment. “I worry about you, love.”   


“Don’t, Mom. I promise I’m fine.” Claire took a deep breath and brought a smile to her face. “And I promise to go have a good time. Happy now?”   


“That’s my girl. I’ll see you out on the patio when it’s midnight!”   
  
Claire left the hall and made her way towards the “Kids Party” being hosted in the Freestyle Club. God, how she hated that label. She was almost 17 and already knew exactly what she wanted to do in life. She was going to become a doctor and help heal people. Perhaps she would join Doctors Without Borders and travel around the world helping those who didn’t have access to or couldn’t afford medical care. Sometimes she even dreamed of settling down with a quiet little practice in her current hometown of Inverness.

She loved the little Scottish town and, in spite of her not having many friends, she also loved the high school she was attending. In many ways it was like all the other school’s she had attended. North High School (home of the North Highland Tigers) was really proud of their sports program and even more proud of their all-star athlete, the ever popular Jamie Fraser. Everyone (students and teachers, alike) fawned all over him and wherever Jamie walked, you could guarantee the blonde-haired Laoghaire Mackenzie wasn’t too far behind. But none of that affected Claire.

Due to the way her parents jobs moved them around so much she had become used to always being “the new girl” at school. She usually just took her seat over in the back in each class, content to pass through the day unbothered and unnoticed. What she really loved about the school, however, was the advanced science program it offered. If she could convince her parents to stay in Inverness until the end of her senior year it would be the highlight of her college applications.

“Um… excuse me?!” Claire was violently jolted out of her thoughts of college and back to the present by a voice she knew all too well. “Earth to the  _ loser _ who is in my way?”

Just as she expected, Laoghaire Mackenzie stood in front of her. She stared at Claire, one hand on her hip and a trademarked scowl on her face. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t see you there,” Claire said, as she stepped out of Laoghaire’s way so she could exit the party and hopefully leave Claire alone. 

“You  _ should _ be sorry. Maybe next time you could try paying more attention to the people around you instead of daydreaming or keeping your nose shoved in that book!” Laoghaire turned with a dramatic flourish and walked away.

Claire sighed and pushed the door open as she headed into the room. She might not be excited to attend the party but she certainly preferred it to staying outside with Laoghaire Mackenzie, of all people. 

Claire took her time to look around the room and saw several of her other classmates from North High. She couldn’t help but groan internally. Just when she thought things were looking up… she found herself surrounded by  _ multiple _ people she knew. There in the very centre of the crowd, head and shoulders above everyone else, was Jamie Fraser. While he wasn’t surrounded by his usual group of mates such as Rupert and Angus, it was apparent he drew a crowd no matter where he went.  

“Mum said I had to make an appearance,” Claire mumbled to herself as she carefully navigated her way to the other side of the room. “She didn’t say I had to stay.”  _ Thank God. _

“JUST LET ME ROCK YOU, TIL THE BREAK OF DAY, COME ON AND DANCE WITH ME.”

So concerned with keeping her head down, she had completely missed the stage set up in the centre of the room. 

_ Jesus. H. Roosevelt Christ. Karaoke?  _ Five minutes and she was out of there. 

“Alright, alright,” a college-aged employee took over the microphone. “Let’s give it up for Kenny and his, what I’m sure you all agree is a  _ very _ , memorable rendition of JT’s ‘Rock Your Body’!”

The crowd clapped and people patted Kenny on the back as he jogged down the steps to rejoin his friends. 

“You know the rules by now, folks. If the spotlight hits you,” the MC pointed to the ceiling as a spotlight began circling over the crowd, “head up on stage because you’re our next singer! Or in this case, two singers for a duet!”

A chorus of “Ooooohhh’s” travelled around the room.

“Let’s see… the terribly tall red headed lad right there,” he said, as the light shone brightly on Jamie Fraser, “and…the lovely raven haired lass there in the back!” 

Horrified, Claire tried to shield her eyes from the spotlight that had been thrust open her. 

“No, no. That’s okay,” she shook her head furiously as she tried to look through the bright light for the nearest exit. 

It was no use. People were nudging her forward and the crowd was so loud, they couldn’t (or perhaps wouldn’t?) hear her protestations. Even her own feet wouldn’t listen to her as she found herself walking up the steps of the stage. Grudgingly taking her place in front of the microphone next to Jamie’s, she smiled at him weakly with a slight nod she hoped would be considered some form of acknowledgement. 

He leaned away from his microphone and whispered to her, “I have to warn ye, lass, I’m no much of a singer. In fact, I canna carry a tune to save my life.”

“That’s okay,” She laughed nervously as she folded her arms across her chest in an attempt to make herself even smaller. “I can assure you I’m not much better.”

“Alright, looks like you’re going to be singing ‘I’m With You’ by the amazing Avril Lavigne! Let’s give them a cheer of encouragement, everyone!” 

Claire was barely aware of the MC leaving stage. All she could do was focus on the music and her heart beating in her chest. She reached out and grabbed the microphone in front of her with a trembling hand. There’s no way she could do this.  

“I’m standing on a bridge,” Jamie began. “I’m waiting in the dark, I thought that you’d be here by now. There’s nothing but the rain, no footsteps on the ground. I’m listening but there’s no sound.” 

He looked at her and when she didn’t make a move to open her mouth he turned away as if to leave the stage.

“Is anyone trying to find me?” She whispered shakingly, the lyrics pulling Jamie back to face her. “Won’t somebody come take me home?”

“It’s a damn cold night,” they sang together. “Trying to figure out this life, won’t you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new. I don’t know who you are, but I…I’m with you.” 

Jamie had been right.. he really wasn’t much of a singer. Really, It was amazing how his incredibly off key voice didn’t stop him from belting out the chorus. Claire did her best to stifle the giggle that rose up from within her. 

Noticing her reaction, Jamie caught her eye and blinked owlishly. She almost lost her cool completely. 

“I’m with you… I’m with you.” They belted out together, bopping along to the tune.

As they sang through the song, they continued glancing over at each other until they gave in and turned their bodies towards each other. From then on, he wasn’t the all-star athlete and she wasn’t the studious one. They were just… Jamie and Claire. Having fun.

“I’m with you…” the music faded only to be replaced with cheers and shouts from the crowd. Claire felt her cheeks burn as she once again became aware of their surroundings and the MC once again returned to the stage.

“All right, all right! That was pretty brilliant. Well,” he laughed. “She was. But you my friend, should probably refrain from ever doing karaoke again.”

“Aye, I plan to”, Jamie laughed and grinned at her before turning to the crowd. “WHAT TEAM??”

“TIGERS!!” 

Claire took the opportunity to leave the stage and disappear into the crowd. This time she was determined to leave the party before something else happened. 

“Claire,” Jamie called from behind her. “Wait, Claire…”

Surprised that he even knew her name. she slowed down and allowed Jamie to catch up with her. 

“Aren’t ye goin’ to stay? It’s no’ even midnight!”

“I think that was enough fun for one night for me, even on New Years Eve” Claire laughed. “I’m going to head over a bit early to meet my parents before the fireworks start.”

“Would ye mind if I walked with ye?” Jamie asked. “I’m supposed to meet my family there, too.”

Emboldened by their shared experience, Claire nodded and led the way out of the club and back into the hall. 

“I have to admit... of all the places I’ve seen you, Jamie Fraser, I never expected to see you up on stage singing karaoke. I wonder what your posse would have to say that?” Claire raised her eyebrow teasingly

“Of all the places? Does that mean ye’ve been watching me, Mistress Beauchamp? I ken ye attend North High, but I dinna think we’ve ever spoken before tonight.”

“I just - I mean...” Claire stammered, face flushing with embarrassment. “Everyone knows you, Jamie. You’re quite popular with everyone at school - especially a certain blonde who can’t let go you more than three feet out of her sight.” Despite her initial nervousness, the banter between them came naturally.

“Ah, Laoghaire, “Jamie laughed. “She’s a friend of the family, we’ve known each other for years. But, what about you, Claire? How did I not know you could sing like that? For that matter, why haven’t we talked before tonight?”

“Sounds like a better question for you to ask yourself than me,” Claire joked. 

“Och. I apologize, lass. I suppose I do get caught up in the daily grind and responsibilities of school and sports.”

“Oh no, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad about it - I was only joking! I mean, no one notices me. I don’t take offense that you haven’t.” This was exactly the reason why Claire chose to keep to herself - to avoid awkward moments like this.

“Who says I haven’t?”

“Haven’t what?” Claire stopped walking and turned to Jamie.

“Noticed.”

“Oh,” Claire struggled to form a response. “Well. I-It’s just…”

“Aye, Sassenach. I noticed ye. It’s just, weel…” Jamie paused for a moment to look out the winder before turning back to her. “As brave a front as I put on, I’m nowhere near that brave on the inside, ken?”

Before Claire could respond, her phone lit up in her hand. Looking at the clock it was obvious  time had flown by as they talked in the hallway.

“I’m so sorry, it’s my mother. It’s almost midnight and she’s wondering where I am.” 

“Aye, that means my family will be looking for me, too.”

They walked together in comfortable silence to the courtyard.

“Goodbye to you then, Jamie,” Claire said when they arrived. She reached out and touched his upper arm in farewell before turning to leave.

“Sassenach, wait!” Jamie grabbed onto her hand as she pulled away. “When school starts back after this holiday, would ye meet me outside the front doors - over by the umbrella rack on the steps? Let me walk ye to our first class?”

“I would like that very much, Jamie.” Claire smiled. “But, I must ask… what does Sassenach mean? You keep calling me that.”

“I’ll tell ye on the first day back when I meet ye on the stairs,” Jamie squeezed her hand before letting go. “I promise ye.”

 

\-----

 

Jamie stood waiting on the steps outside the front doors of North High School, fiddling with his phone. Why hadn’t he thought to get her number? He was such a fool! The bell was due to ring any minute and he still had not seen even a glimpse of Claire since he has arrived on campus half an hour ago. 

He watched as some of the boys from the rugby team made their way up the stairs to the front entrance.

“Jamie, lad.” Ruper called. “Are ye coming? We canna be late to class - Coach will have our hides if we get written up for being late on the first day!” 

“Aye, coming!” Jamie called back as he made one last sweep of the empty stairs and lawn in front of school. 

He took his time picking his backpack up off the ground and with a sigh grudgingly followed the boys inside to class.

 


	2. Start of Something New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire returns to North High School later than expected and makes a surprising discovery.

Claire raised her hand in an attempt to shield her eyes from the blinding white light. As her sight adjusted she couldn’t resist smiling at the landscape in front of her. There really was nothing like the crisp feeling in the air and freshly fallen white snow on the ground during a Scottish winter. The snow crunched beneath her boots as she made her way up the front steps of North High School. She passed the umbrella rack, holding a lonely umbrella - something a student had undoubtedly left behind, and made her way into the from hallway.

Despite the new school term starting well over a week ago, the school was still filled with that fresh sense of excitement and nervousness of seeing long lost friends and discovering what the rest of the school year would bring. She could hardly believe it had been 15 years since the last time she had set foot in this school and, yet, it felt like it was only yesterday that she had run through the hallways with her classmates, excited to celebrate the winter holidays. Everything from the scuffed linoleum floor to the chipped red lockers looked the same and unfortunately, Claire sniffed at the air, smelled the same as she remembered. 

As she walked down the hallway towards the Nurse’s Station, she considered how once again she found herself in the position of “the new girl” or, in this case, “the new faculty member”. Her position within the school might have changed but she was still the “outsider”. Apparently it wasn’t just the school itself that never changed. Still, she couldn’t complain. Her life had spun out of control following the breakdown of, not only of her engagement but, entire relationship with Frank and the decision to take a year-long sabbatical from the Boston Children’s Hospital (BCH) had been as easy one. The decision to relocate to Scotland had been even easier as everything seemed to fall into place much easier than anything she had ever done back in Boston. A surprise visit to catch up with North High’s former drama teacher, Mrs. Graham, had led her to this job opportunity.

Admittedly, finding employment had actually been on the bottom of her to-do list. Her position as Assistant Paediatric Surgeon at BCH had paid well and, so long as she lived frugally, the savings in her bank account should comfortably any expenses during her travels. But when she discovered that Mrs. Graham’s granddaughter, Fiona, had been recently diagnosed with a serious illness that had left her bedridden and the school without a Nurse, she didn’t hesitate enquiring with the school’s administration office to see how she could help.

She knew that returning would bring up old memories but she was surprised by how her thoughts lingered on the last New Years Eve she spent here in her youth. She never got the chance to meet up with Jamie Fraser and now she was curious as to what he had been doing since then. Most likely he had gone on to university, perhaps even become a professional athlete after graduation. He might have gotten married and now had his own children. She could just imagine him with a blonde haired adult version of Laoghaire Mackenzie and their offspring running about. Considering her general lack of interest in sports and choice to steer away from mainstream media, really anything was possible.

“Alright Beauchamp,” she told herself as she looked around the Nurse’s Station, taking a mental inventory of the equipment and supplies. “Stop revelling in the past and focus on the present. First item on the agenda: getting this office into order before I officially start tomorrow.”

The time passed quickly once she got to work, doing a thorough stocktake and making a list of all the items she would need to add. It was apparent Fiona was not only professional but very well organised, making things easy for Claire. The changes she intended to make were mostly related to her personal preferences than anything else. She glanced down at her watch to discover it was almost 6pm -  by the time she locked things up, drove home and prepared herself for her first day as School Nurse she would be in desperate need of a good night’s sleep.

Making sure all the lights were turned off, Claire pulled the locked door closed behind her and began the long walk through the halls towards the faculty parking lot. She was sure there was a quicker route but it had been so long since she had explored the main building she didn’t mind. She trailed her hand along the Highland Tigers mural that must have been a recent addition to the hall. She could just see tiny signatures scratched into the paw prints that trailed along in front of her. It was good to see that school pride hadn’t diminished any in the time she had been gone. The School Nurse position guaranteed a slower pace than she was used to at BCH but she suspected the students would keep her on her toes. 

Her ruminations were interrupted by the sound of music, muffed by a myriad of voices and other noises. Looking to her right she realized she had walked upon the entrance to the auditorium, a space where she recalled many school assemblies and student-led performances took place. She tilted her head and smiled to herself as she made out what sounded like the children rehearsing for a musical of some sort. The introduction of a voice so incredibly off key made her stop and take a step back towards the door. What came over her could only be described as a sense of deja vu, assurance that this wasn’t the first time her senses had been assaulted in such a way.

Claire placed the palm of her hand on the smooth wood that separated her from what was waiting inside and reached down for the handle with the other. She pushed it open as quietly as possible and peeked inside. The lighting near the entrance was dim so she moved inside and took her time looking around at the scene before her as her eyes adjusted. Several school kids were scattered around the auditorium, rehearsing and building what looked like set pieces. In the midst of it all, a tall red headed man was dancing around and singing off key at the top of his lungs, much to the apparent amusement of the children. 

It couldn’t be him. Surely, it wasn’t _possible._ She squinted in an attempt to get a clearer view of the man. She hadn’t seen him in years and he had aged visibly yet, somehow it was like nothing had changed at all. He still held the stage without any apparent effort, played to the crowd and enjoyed life to its fullest. So taken by the physical appearance of Jamie Fraser she only now realised that he was singing ‘I’m With You’ - the same song they had sung together on that memorable holiday, the last she ever went on with her parents. 

She made her way down the aisle, intending to quietly take a seat in the shadows and watch the impromptu performance. Her plans were interrupted, however, when she tripped over a damn electrical cord sticking out into the aisle and fell flat on her face. 

_ ‘Jesus. H. Roosevelt Christ,’  _ she mumbled into the carpet remaining where she was in favour of pretending it hadn’t happened at all.

“Hey, Mr. Fraser! Looks like yer singing’s so bad it actually made someone faint!” The boy cackled as Jamie jumped down from the stage and ran towards her. 

“Och! Away with ye, Alec. Ye wee gomeral!” 

A pair of large hands gently pulled her to her feet and held onto her by the upper arms as she regained her balance.

“Are ye okay, lass? Do ye need me to-” 

As his face came into focus, she watched his blue eyes change from concerned, to disbelieving. 

“Sassenach?” His hand tightened around her. “You're real.”

“So are you,” the chuckle that had built up in her throat died away and she felt the heat in her chest spread up her neck all the way to her face. “Hello, Jamie. It’s been a while.”

In her peripheral vision, she saw a short lady pushed her way through the students gathered around to witness the spectacle, ushering them all back to work as she went. 

“Oh, for heaven's sake, lad. Stop hanging on to the poor lass and let’s have a look.” At her appearance Jamie looked down at his hands and dropped them quickly. “Are ye alright, Miss…”

Claire held out her hand to Mrs. Fitz and introduced herself. “Claire Beauchamp. It’s nice to meet you, ma’am.”

Mrs. Fitz leaned back and stared hard at Claire. She lowered her hand but otherwise remained still as the older woman looked her up and down, apparently assessing everything she could see. “Aye, name’s Mrs. Fitzgibbons, Head of the Drama Department. Everybody calls me Mrs. Fitz.” A smile came upon the woman’s face and the tension released from Claire’s shoulders. “You may also.”

Claire tilted her head to the right and felt a sharp pain radiate up the side of her neck.

“Are ye sure yer alright, Sassenach? I can call a doctor if ye need - or perhaps someone to come and pick you up?”

“That won't be necessary, thank you for the concern though.” Claire took a moment to mentally assess her body for any lasting injuries and ultimately decided to change the subject in an attempt to regain some of her dignity. “What exactly are you all rehearsing for?”

“Tis the spring musicale,” said Mrs. Fitz with a flourish. “Jamie, here, is in charge of helping the students with set construction. As ye can see the work has only just begun.”

“Oh, are you a member of the faculty, too?” Claire asked Jamie, slightly embarrassed by the obviously hopeful lilt to her voice.

“Nae, I’m just here to help out - no matter what Mrs. Fitz claims.” Jamie threw a smirk Mrs. Fitz’s way. “Do ye see the young red-haired lass over by the painting station? That’s my niece Ellie. She and her older brother Robbie attend North High and I try to be as involved as possible. I’d offer to introduce ye but I think I embarrassed her somewhat with my singing and it’s best to leave her be for a time, ken?”

Claire laughed. “I understand completely. I really should be leaving - I actually had intended on being home by now if you can believe.”

“Aye, I can,” Jamie grinned. “Let me at least walk ye to yer car to make sure you get off campus safely? I dinna want anything else to happen to ye!”

With a short farewell to Mrs. Fitz and a wave to the students, Claire led the way out of the auditorium and back into the hallway. 

“It’s very fine to see ye, Sassenach, after all this time. What exactly are you doing here?” Claire raised her eyebrow at his question and he sputtered in response. “Err… not that I’m trying to pry into yer personal business, I just-” 

“I’m here to meet you, of course! And I must apologise - I know I arrived a tad late,” Claire teased and she smiled sheepishly as she watched the confusion on Jamie’s face morph into something that resembled remembrance. 

“Oh, aye - our meeting. As I recall I stood outside freezing my arse off for almost an hour before heading inside, all in turmoil because the raven-haired Sassenach I’d connected with on holiday had stood me up.”

“Oh, Jamie I am sorry. I just...”

“Dinna fash, Claire. I was only teasing ye back a bit. But ye still havena answered my question: What are you doing back here after all these years?”

“You, Sir, are looking at North High’s newest School Nurse! Officially, I start tomorrow but popped by to make sure my station was all set up ready for my first day on the job.”

“Really?” Jamie’s face lit up at the news. “I kent Fiona taking ill was a shock to everyone and HR weren’t sure they would be able to fill the position anytime soon. I’m glad they did, though and I’m verra glad it was you who took the position.” 

“It was rather a surprise and unexpected turn of events how it happened, This one here is mine.” Claire said, as they arrived at her car. She was particularly proud of the little blue Mazda hatchback she had purchased second hand from an elderly couple just outside Inverness. She had still been in position of a rental car she when she had received the call to confirm her new position at School Nurse and instantly went in search of a more permanent replacement. It was a few years older than many of the cars in the parking lot and it sported a small dent here and there but the interior had been well cared for the the engine was in perfect condition. It was all she needed to get to and from work.

“I will bid ye farewell. Make sure to get a good night’s rest before your first big day, aye? I suspect ye’ll need it,” Jamie laughed as he held the door open as she placed her tote in the backseat. “I hope to see ye around soon, Sassenach.”

Claire closed the door and moved to open the one on the driver’s side. “You know… you never did tell me what that meant. ‘Sassenach’, I mean.”

“Come find me in the auditorium when ye finish work tomorrow and I will,” Jamie said, blinking slowly at her just as he had done that night 15 years ago. “I promise.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason Jamie happens to be singing THAT song is because as the person in charge of building sets he’s also in charge of the radio settings. We have no doubt that, based on his choice in music, all the children (his niece and nephew in particular) have determined that he’s incredibly lame - in an endearing way, of course. If you ever find anything in the fic to be a little too convenient to be believable just remember - it’s inspired by a Disney Channel Original Movie ;)
> 
> J & A x


	3. High School Musical

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire gets roped into helping with the school musical…

“Alright, Sydney. I think you’re all ready to go,” Claire said, putting the last bit of tape on the bandage on the tenth grader’s forehead. “You will most likely have a headache for a little longer and you need to make sure to clean the wound and switch out the bandages twice a day, but otherwise should be just fine.”

“Thank ye, Miss Beauchamp - for yer help  _ and _ for not sending me to get stitches. Truly!” 

Claire chuckled as Sydney visibly shuddered at the thought. “Stop by and see me in a couple of days so I can make sure it’s healing properly. And next time you start running down the hallways  _ please _ make sure there are no open lockers in your way?”

“I will,” Sydney laughed as she began walking towards the door. “Thank ye, again!” 

It had been a good first day as School Nurse. It was nothing compared to the adrenaline inducing events and typical pace of a day’s work at BCH but she found herself enjoying the calm environment. The newness in and of itself was exciting and position brought its own, admittedly much smaller, challenges to keep her busy. She had seen a few students here and there and could already see a pattern of students trying to get a note to skip gym class. She couldn’t wait to see what the rest of the school term would bring. 

Claire gathered her personal belongings and prepared to make her way to the auditorium. It had been such a pleasant surprise to see Jamie again after more than a decade and she couldn't deny she was keen to get to know more about him -  _ really _ get to know him. What has he been doing all these years? It was evident that the past fifteen years had been good to him. Even clothed in multiple layers she could see he radiated health and was certainly more muscular than he had been back as a student. She claimed it was the doctor in her that noticed these things and would deny it if anyone accused her of anything different.

The doors to the auditorium were already open when she arrived. The scene that greeted her when she stepped inside was much the same as it had been the night before. Students of various ages were scattered about, some working on sets, others running lines or rehearsing around the piano. In the middle of it all was Mrs. Fitz, waving her arms about and directing everyone around her. 

“Millie, dear, as much as I love the bravery you put forth trying to hit that high E, I really think you would serve yourself better, and the audience, to stick to your range, hmm?” Mrs. Fitz looked out over her glasses at the girl, eyebrows raised.

“Yes, Mrs. Fitz.” Poor Millie said sheepishly making her way back to the piano assumably to work on the “notes in her range.” 

Claire walked closer as she continued to look around the stage spotting Jamie at the exact same time he looked up at her, a smile appearing on his face.

“Sassenach! You’re here! Come on up - grab a paintbrush and help us out.”

Claire dropped her tote on one of the auditorium seats. “Paintbrush? Wait wait wait, no one said anything about painting today!” She teased. 

“I can guarantee ye that anyone who sets foot in this auditorium,  _ will  _ end up helping out.” Jamie stage whispered as he leaned closer to Claire. “I’m just claiming ye before Mrs. Fitz has a chance to put you to work doing God knows what, ken?”

Jamie stood and reached out for Claire’s hand to help her up onto the stage. Claire picked up a spare paintbrush and set to work helping him colour a large piece of wood that was clearly intended to be used as a background drop.

“So, I understand that you’re in charge of building the sets for the spring musical - is this something you do for all the student plays?” Claire asked, dipping the paintbrush back into the can of paint.

“Aye, there’s two plays a year and I do my best to make sure I’m available to help out with both. You saw my niece rehearsing last night-”

“Yes - Ellie, right?” Jamie nodded happily at Claire’s interruption.

“Ellie and her old brother Robbie are usually involved as is one of my other nephews, Young Jamie. This way I can bring them to and from rehearsals and give their folks some time for other things. Ellie and Robbie are my brother Willie’s only two but my sister Jenny has five other bairns to look after beside Young Jamie.”

Claire felt her eye widen at the thought of so many children and Jamie laughed.

“It’s not always easy having so many bairns about, I’ll admit. This year, Robbie has started making a fuss claiming he can drive himself since he’s a Senior  but truthfully… I like to think deep down he doesna mind it much.” Jamie raised his shoulders with a chuckle. “It’s been a tradition of ours for years and I suspect he just didn’t want to admit he wanted to take part in the ritual one last time before heading off to university next year.”

“It sounds like you come from a rather big family - I can’t even imagine what that’s like.”

“I suspect ye dinna want to,” Jamie laughed. “I also have a younger brother, Robert. He’s currently out of the country attending grad school so we dinna see him all that much except during the holidays.”

“I. Will. Not. Stand for this!” a high pitched voice rang out interrupting their conversation. “I need room to create, to think, to feel, to be in  _ character _ !” 

Claire turned wide eyed to Jamie. “Well now, she seems to have her knickers in a twist. Who is that?!” 

“That,” Jamie sighed, “would be Malva Christie. Shining Star of the drama department, or so she’d have you think. And the shy lad standing there behind her is Allan, her twin brother.”

“They... seem like an interesting pair.” 

“That they are. Malva gives Ellie a fair bit of trouble, since they’re usually both competing for the same role. But... Ellie has a good head on her shoulders and she can hold her own. She usually puts Malva in her place if need be.” Jamie assured her with a laugh.

“That’s good. I think… growing up you have to learn to be tough and stand up for what you want in life. I’m glad she doesn’t back down if she doesn’t have to.”

“Is that what you had to do? Learn to be tough, I mean? I canna imagine that, the wee thing ye were back in high school.”

“Well, yes. I suppose you could say that. When I was a teenager, I suddenly found myself without my mother or father and the next thing I knew I was travelling around the world with my Uncle Lamb. He worked a lot and for much of the time, I was alone. But, I soon learned to be strong and fight for my dreams - for what I wanted out of life. It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been worth it. Definitely.”

“Och, your parents have passed on, then? I didna know. I’m so sorry, Claire.”

“Thank you. It was years ago, now. I ended up completing my senior year in Boston, Massachusetts of all places. I ended up at medical school which in a roundabout way lead me back to Boston working at Children’s Hospital.”

“As a paediatric nurse?” Jamie asked.

“Assistant Paediatric Surgeon, actually.” Claire was proud of her work as a surgeon and took unabashed delight in the look on Jamie’s face. “I just knew with.... every fibre of my being I was meant to be a doctor, ever since I was a little girl. I wasn’t going to let anything stand in my way.”

“Ye’ve gone and left me speechless, Sassenach.” Jamie laughed. “Is there anything else ye would like to surprise me with while I’m still on floor level?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t usually share so much about myself! Must be something about you, Jamie, that brings it out in me.” Jamie stared at her for a beat and she felt her cheeks flush. “So, what about you? Did you go on to be the amazing athlete everyone knew you would?”

“Aye. Aye, I did. For a time. I graduated high school and went on the University of Edinburgh. I played for the school team for a couple of years before I was drafted by the Glasgow Warriors. At one point I even played for Scotland but… ah, a bad injury to my hand took me out of the game for good.” Jamie flexed his left hand, his movements visibly difficult and the joints stiff.

“Jamie, I’m so sorry!” Claire reached for his hand but pulled back just in time. “I had no idea.”

“Dinna fash, Sassenach. I truly wasna happy as a professional athlete. Now, I run Lallybroch Farms and I’m here with my family - it suits me just fine. What was ye said? That ye kent what ye wanted to do with every fibre of yer being? It’s a bit like that.”

They continued their work in comfortable silence and Claire contemplated their conversation.

“That reminds me, Fraser. I demand to know exactly why you call me ‘Sassenach’.”

“Weel, mostly Scots use it to refer to people who were English but it means ‘outsider’... for lack of a better explanation.”

“Oh, ‘Outsider’. So, that’s what I always was to you… an outsider?”

“Yes! I mean no, I mean…” Jamie rubbed a hand down over his face. “I’m not explaining this well.”

“Oh no, I get your meaning perfectly. I was the new girl from England, who didn’t quite fit in. There’s no denying I was different. You shouldn’t feel bad,” Claire laughed.

“Och! It’s  _ because  _ you were different, Claire. Ye weren’t like the other girls. Ye were so smart, not afraid to go your own way, to take your own path, and... you weren’t bad to look at either.” Jamie blinked owlishly at her and she struggled to retain her composure, instead putting on her most stern face usually reserved for unruly patients.

“Are you trying to charm your way out of this, Mr. Fraser?” 

“Dinna ken... is it working?”

“I-”

“Mistress Beauchamp, my dear,” Mrs. Fitz interrupted them. “I must implore you for your help.” 

“Absolutely,” Claire placed her brush down - it was almost dry from lack of use anyway. “What can I do for you, Mrs. Fitz?”

“Weel, you see, dear. Fiona always helped me out with the theatre productions every year… Auditions, inventory, advertising,  assistant directing, making sure all the little minor things ran smoothly. Essentially a second assistant. And with her gone...” Mrs Fitz paused dramatically. It was becoming extremely evident Mrs. Fitz had thoroughly earned her position as Head of the department.

“You would like me to help? I’m afraid I don’t know  _ anything _ about theatre productions.”

“Och, that doesn’t matter.” Mrs Fitz waved her injections away. “Neither did Fiona. I just need someone to help me out every now and again when I need another opinion on something. Could you do it, my dear? I am counting on you!”

_ Why not?  _ Claire thought. She was already committed to facing every challenge that came across her path this year, anyway. “I would love to.”

“Perfect!” Mrs. Fitz said, clapping her hands together. “It’s settled! You, Laoghaire and I will make the Dream Drama Team!”

“Laoghaire?” Claire questioned. “That name is so familiar. You don’t mean-”

“Aye,” Jamie said. “Laoghaire Mackenzie, from our own high school days. She is Mrs. Fitz’s granddaughter.”

“You went to school with Laoghaire? I didn’t know that!” Mrs Fitz appeared delighted by the news.

“Yes, we were in the same year when I attended North High for part of my junior year.”

“Oh my my, so it’s been a reunion for you and Jamie!”

“Yes, it has turned out that way,” agreed Claire, throwing a look at Jamie.

“Well, I have nae doubt Laoghaire will be glad to see ye, too!” Mrs Fitz turned around with a clap of her hands. “Alright, students. Let’s take it from the top!”


	4. I Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jamie & Claire spend some time alone and Mrs. Fitz is a meddling ol’ besum.

Claire found herself settling into her position at North High at surprising speed. Members of faculty had quickly accepted her as part of the team and the students she had interacted with so far had been extremely respectful. She suspected she could thank Jamie, just a little bit, for that. It was obvious that he was on friendly terms with almost everyone and the majority of the students looked up at him with something that could be described as a combination of admiration and worship. Him being so open and welcoming towards her had made the transition easier, she knew. 

Preparation for the spring musical had been progressing under the watchful eye of Mrs Fitz. Claire had yet to be asked to do anything beyond her regular duties and her initial wariness at accepting the drama teacher's request for help had since calmed. Her time was mostly spent listening to Mrs Fitz talk and assisting students with small tasks here and there. One thing she could always count on was rehearsals being entertaining. Just the thought of Jamie bopping along to the music in his head only to get caught by Mrs Fitz who simply stood there and looked at him with an eyebrow raised made her laugh out loud.

The sound of knuckles rapping on her office door interrupted both her musings and her laughter.

“Come in!” She called putting down her pen, eager for a distraction. She had never been a fan of sitting at a desk for long periods of time and filling out incident reports was nothing more than a strong reminder of that.

“Claire? Claire Beauchamp?” The door opened and in strode a slender woman, with rose-petal skin and moonbeam hair tied up into a messy bun.

“Laoghaire?” Claire asked, her suspicions confirmed as the woman nodded her head. Claire stood up to help the woman with all the fabric overflowing from her arms. “Here, let me help you with that.”

“Thank ye kindly, Claire. I’m so sorry I haven't come around to say hello yet. I kent from some of the other teachers ye had taken over Fiona’s position but I’ve just been so busy preparing the costumes for the musical! I spend all day behind the sewing machines teaching class in the Home Ec room only to then stay later sewing all of this!” Laoghaire waved her hand over the pile of outfits now strewn across Claire's desk.

“Oh, please don’t apologize! I've been settling in and catching up on everything Fiona had left behind. I am excited to be working with you and Mrs. Fitz for the spring musical. Perhaps we’ll be seeing much more of each other as the opening date approaches.” Claire smiled at her. She was both hopeful and wary of things going smoothly.

“Aye, that's what I'm here to talk to ye about actually! Would ye be please be a dear, and take these costumes to the auditorium and hang them up in the costume room behind the stage when ye get a moment? I would do it myself, it's just I've been inundated with requests for my services and don't have the time. I'm sure the students would really appreciate it!”

“Yes, of course,” Claire agreed, simply happy that they were getting along, teenage rivalries of old long forgotten. “I've only got a little more paperwork to do and then I’ll go past the auditorium on my way out.”

 

\-----

 

It was odd to be the only one in the auditorium after so many bustling, and often-times loud, rehearsals. Yet, it was also soothing somehow. It felt like her life had been accelerating at full speed ever since she had accepted the job and it was nice to have some time to move about mindlessly. Sequins sparkled in the bright fluorescent lights of the costume room as she hung the costumes on old wooden hangers one at a time. Just as she was reaching for the last piece, Mrs Fitz found her.

“Claire, dear! I'm so glad I caught ye before ye left for the day! I'm afraid I must ask ye a favour at this very late hour.”

“Of course, Mrs Fitz,” Claire smiled at her and placed the remaining coat hangers in the box beside the long clothing rack. “What is it I can help you with?”

“I know Saturday is a non-working day for ye... but would you be available to come in tomorrow morning? I really need to go over the script and make sure we have the timing right with both the lines and the music. I would have liked to have organized it during the week but with the fast paced nature of rehearsals, I just haven’t had the time to devote to it. Would you mind?”

“Not at all, Mrs Fitz.” Claire's weekends were usually filled with morning jogs around the park, lazy brunches and perhaps some exploring if the weather was ideal. She could easily make time to pop by and help. “Just don’t get too upset when you see first hand how very little I know about things when it comes to musicals!” 

“I promise I won’t.” Mrs. Fitz chuckled. “See you Saturday, dear!”

 

\-----

 

Claire walked into the auditorium, iced chai latte in hand, to find it just as quiet and peaceful as it had been the day before. Claire glanced at her watch. Perhaps arriving late on weekends was a Scottish pastime she wasn’t yet aware of? With nothing else to do, she dropped her purse onto one of the seats in the front row and walked up stairs onto the stage. 

What would it be like, she wondered as she slowly waltzed around the stage, to have the spotlight shone on her and perform in front of hundreds of people? She began to hum, listening to her voice bounce off the walls. It was almost as if someone had pressed play on the CD player, guitar playing the background as she began to sing.  

_I'm walking fast through the traffic lights_   
_Busy streets and busy lives_   
_And all we know_   
_Is touch and go_   
_We are alone with our changing minds_   
_We fall in love 'til it hurts or bleeds or fades in time_   
_And I never saw you coming  
And I'll never be the same_

_You come around and the armor falls_   
_Pierce the room like a cannonball  
Now all we know is don't let go_

_We are alone, just you and me_   
_Up in your room and our slates are clean_   
_Just twin fire signs  
Four blue eyes_

The acoustic version of Taylor Swift’s ‘State of Grace’ had been stuck in her head for days and the lyrics came to mind easily. She paused to double check that she was still alone. 

_So you were never a saint_   
_And I’ve loved in shades of wrong_   
_We learn to live with the pain_   
_Mosaic broken hearts  
But this love is brave and wild_

_I never_   
_Saw you coming  
And I'll never be the same_

_This is a state of grace_   
_This is the worthwhile fight_   
_Love is a ruthless game_   
_Unless you play it good and right_   
_These are the hands of fate_   
_You're my Achilles heel  
T his is the golden age of something good and right and real_

She leaned back against the balustrade and smiled. The acoustics here in the empty auditorium were so much better than that of her little Mazda hatchback, that’s for sure. 

_And I never saw you coming  
_ _And I'll never be the same_

_And I never_   
_Saw you coming  
And I'll never be the same_

_This is a state of grace_   
_This is the worthwhile fight_   
_Love is a ruthless game  
Unless you play it good and right_

“Yer voice is just as bonnie as the last time I heard it, Sassenach.”

“Jamie!” She gasped with a hand on her chest. “I didn't see you come in! I would never have done that if I had known I wasn't alone.

Jamie smiled at her and she felt her cheeks flush. “Och, ye shouldna hold back - not around me. You’ve heard _me_ sing, after all.”

“That’s true, I have.” Claire laughed as she moved to the edge of the stage. From this height she was much taller than Jamie and she took her time studying him from this angle. He usually dressed in blue jeans and a simple long sleeve sweater but today he sported fitted dark grey jeans, a light grey long sleeve t-shirt with a blue denim jacket thrown on top. More than anything, she was taken by his face looking up at her. So used to him being clean shaven, she found his scruffy beard alluring, even more so than his free flowing curly red hair that normally caught her eye.

Jamie interrupted her wandering thoughts. “Mrs. Fitz roped you into working today too, aye?”

“She did - I don’t mind though.” Claire admitted. “And you, did she rope you into helping work on the script, too?”

“Nae, she told me she needed help designing a new part of the set she’d forgotten about and asked me to meet her here.”

“She is nothing, if not dedicated.” Claire chuckled. “And a bit late, it seems.”

“Well, that just leaves us with time to sit and rest up before she puts us to work for the rest of the day.” Jamie hopped up to sit on the edge of the stage, his legs swinging. “This brings back memories of our karaoke night, being on stage together.” 

“Oh goodness, don’t remind me. That was the most humiliating night of my life, I think.” Claire sat down beside him, her legs crossed.

“Ouch! Thank ye, Sassenach, for sparing my feelings.”

“No, singing with you was great! Well... technically the _singing_ wasn’t all that great,” she teased. “More than anything, I just was _so_ mortified to be called up on stage in front of everyone! I have never handled being in the spotlight very well and I certainly never thought I would find myself singing on stage with the most popular guy in school.”

“It couldna been that bad could it, his singing aside?” Jamie asked.

“No,” Claire laughed. “It wasn’t that bad in the end. Especially when I was talking with him after only to discover he was so very different from the persona everyone had painted of him.” 

“I always did wonder…”

“Hmmm?”

“What happened after New Year’s Eve? You never came back to school - it was like ye just…vanished. I remember asking around school if anyone kent what happened or where ye were and getting incredibly frustrated when no two answers where the same. In hindsight I probably shouldna bothered and just gone straight to the head office to ask.”

“My dad’s company suddenly transferred him to their Dublin branch. He was notified of the transfer New Year’s Day, and told it was effective immediately. I was giving no choice in the matter. Not really the best way to ring in the new year, let me tell you.” Claire said

“I suppose not.”

“And then things just seems to go from bad to worse. I really did feel like vanishing after everything that occurred.”

“Aye? With the move, ye mean?” Jamie asked.

“Not just the move.” Claire paused for a moment, mulling over her words. “My, ah… my parents were killed in a car crash not long after we’d settled in Dublin. They were on the way home from a business dinner when a drunk driver ran through a red light and crashed into the side of their car. They died instantly.”

Claire looked up at Jamie, emboldened by the look in his eyes. They weren’t ones of sadness or pity like she had expected but instead ones of kindness and understanding.

“I always tried to take comfort in that. The knowledge that they didn’t suffer.” She took a deep breath, “After that... it was all a blur. The funeral, packing everything up, my Uncle Lamb coming to take care of all the legalities involved. He took over guardianship until I turned 18, although he really looked after me a lot longer after that. I went to live with him in Boston and Lamb was kind enough to stay put until I graduated, organising his work so that we would only travel during the holidays. I have such fond memories of travelling with Lamb, and his passing has only made me cherish them more.”

“I am truly sorry for all ye’ve suffered, Claire.” Jamie reached out and wrapped his large hands around hers. “I hope right here and now, ye ken you have a place - that you aren’t alone.” 

Claire tilted her head to the side as she looked at him. The impromptu decision to travel to Scotland had certainly turned out to be a good one. She felt more at home here in Inverness than she had anywhere else in a long time.

Jamie looked down at their hands, still connected tightly, and hesitated. “Can I ask ye a question?”

“Of course.”

“Well, my question, I don't wish to, that is, I don't mean to imply-”

“Out with it.” Claire interrupted his rambling with a soft smile.

“Is it usual, what it is between us when we’re together? Whether it be on stage singing karaoke or being put to work by Mrs. Fitz?”

“No, this isn't usual.” Claire looked unblinkingly into his eyes. “It's different.” 

They remained silent for a moment simply looking at each other, both seemingly lost for words when the auditorium door slammed open.

“Nunkie!! We’ve been looking for you - the game is starting soon!” Jamie dropped her hand from his as a bundle of small children ran down the aisle followed by a frazzled looking Ellie.

“It’s almost two, already? Christ, time got away from me!” Jamie swung his legs and jumped off the stage before turning around to help Claire down. 

“Not yet, Uncle, but ye ken we always get ice cream before to eat during the game!” One of the children said excitedly.

“Robbie says it’s good luck for us to do it!” The younger girl with dark straight hair piped up, nodding her head furiously. 

“Aye, so it is.” Jamie chuckled. “Claire let me introduce ye to my nieces and nephews. This is Maggie, Kitty, Michael and Janet. These are some of Jenny and Ian’s bairns. For that matter, where are yer mam and da?”

“Uncle Ian and Auntie Jenny are saving our seats for us.” Ellie explained. “Auntie Jenny _said_ to come get you and tell you to hurry it up or she’d ‘tan yer hide and not feed ye for a week’!” 

“And no doubt she means it, aye?” Jamie laughed and turned to Claire. “I’m so sorry, Sassenach. I didna plan to leave so suddenly, although it’s become apparent Mrs. Fitz had plans other than working today with us today.”

“I suppose she did.” Claire shook her head at the woman’s antics.

“She’s a meddling ol’ besum, but I ken she means well. It just makes a change that I’m glad for once,” Jamie smiled his eyes sparkling.

“Uncle Jamie, can Miss Beauchamp come, too?” Young Jamie asked. Claire hadn’t even seen him arrive. “She might even be able to help if any of the players get hurt. She bandaged up my scraped knee the other day and it didna even hurt!”

“Aye? We will have to ask Claire, if she wants to join us.”

“Okay!” Young Jamie turned to Claire excitedly. “Miss. Claire, would ye like to come with us to Robbie’s rugby game? We would be ever so happy!”

“How can I say no to such a charming offer of spending an afternoon with all of you?” Claire looked at all the faces waiting for her answer. “I would be delighted.”

“Hooray!” shouted Michael, grabbing Claire’s hand. “Did ye hear, Nunkie? She thinks we are charming!”

“Aye, I heard, wee Michael.” Jamie laughed and looked over at Claire. “And I’m certainly glad she accepted our, I mean, _your_ offer.”

 

\-----

 

With ice cream and various other treats in hand, the boisterous group made their way up the stands to where Jamie’s family was waiting. 

“Mama, Mama!” Wee Janet called. “We brought the ice cream AND Uncle Jamie’s friend!”

“Oh, aye?” An older man with short hair the same colour and shade as Jamie’s leaned over. “I didna ken Uncle Jamie had any friends!” 

“Och, away wi’ ye, William!” Jamie laughed at what was obviously regular banter between brothers. “Jenny, Ian, Rachel and Willie... meet Claire Beauchamp. We ken each other from high school but Claire has just temporarily taken over the position as North High’s school nurse.”

“Hello everyone,” Claire smiled. “It’s so nice to meet you all!”

“Claire! We have heard a lot about ye from the children.” Ian nodded. “You’re helping with the school musical too, aye?” 

“Yes, I am. Although, truthfully I’m not sure just how much help I am, but it’s been fun so far!”

The children had all taken their seats and Jamie stepped back allowing Claire space to sit down next to Jenny before joining them.

“Jenny,” Claire started. “I have to tell you, Young Jamie is just precious. Whenever I see him at rehearsals he’s having the best of time and lending a helping hand whenever needed.”

“Well, thank ye kindly, Claire. ‘Tis good to hear.” Jenny smiled politely, with a curt nod of her head. She leaned forward to address Jamie, holding the bairn strapped to her chest tight. “So, brother. How is Laoghaire? I spoke to Mrs. FItz the other day when I saw her at the market and she said Laoghaire had been such a help with the musical and the costumes so far! I’m sure you’ve both been busy at rehearsals, trying to get everything ready.”

“Aye,” Jamie glanced briefly at Jenny before returning to look out at the players making their way onto the field.. “We have all been busy making sure we do what needs to be done to make sure the musical is a success.” 

“Oh, that is wonderful. Tell her I said hello and to stop by Lallybroch sometime. It’s been a while since she last visited.”

Claire sat back only half-listening to the conversation taking place right in front of her. Was Jamie dating Laoghaire? He hadn’t mentioned anything about it but then again, they hadn’t discussed their personal relationships with other people.

“Game’s starting!” Ian shouted interrupting the conversation. “LET’S GO TIGERS!!!”

 

\-----

 

Everyone cheered and congratulated Robbie as he walked over to join his family where they waited at the bottom of the bleachers. 

“Great job, my lad, really well done!” Willie patted his son on the back. “We are so proud of you - I’m surprised ye couldna hear yer mam yelling from here after you scored that try!”

“If ye keep playing like that, yer sure to be playing for Scotland just like yer uncle!” said Laoghaire, joining the group. 

“Laoghaire!” Jenny made room for Laoghaire in the circle they had formed and pulled her into a one-armed hug. “I was just asking Jamie about you and how you were doing!” 

Claire took this as her cue to leave and head home. 

“Thank you all so much for inviting me and letting me sit with you during the game. It’s been a long time since I watched a high school rugby game - especially one as enjoyable as this. Robbie, congratulations on a fantastic win! I will see most of you at school, I’m sure.” Claire said, her voice perhaps a little too cheery considering how she terrible she felt on the inside. All that was left to do was… what was it Mrs. Fitz had called it? That’s it: exit, stage right. 

Beginning the long walk to her car parked on the other side of the school, she chided herself for thinking today had meant more than it had. This year was just supposed to be a year off and her position as school nurse only temporary. No distractions, no attachments made, and certainly no falling in love. Jamie was her friend, her colleague, an old acquaintance. Nothing more. 

“Wait, Sassenach!” She stopped and turned to look at Jamie jogging after her. “Ye dinna have to leave. We usually all go out for a big family dinner after a game - I would love if ye would join us.”

“Thank you, Jamie. That’s a very kind offer but I have so much to do before the new week starts. Maybe, another time.”

“Of course, you had your entire Saturday taken up by me and my family,” Jamie laughed a little awkwardly. “I hope to see you on Monday?”

“Yes, of course you will. The show must go on and, considering we did very little today I’m sure Mrs. Fitz will have an entire list of things to do waiting for us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The acoustic version of Taylor Swift’s ‘State of Grace’ can be found on YouTube.


	5. Bop To The Top

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Auditions to find a replacement for the newly opened lead female role in the musical are scheduled and Claire gets ready for a date.

“Attention, everyone!” Mrs Fitz clapped her hands from the front of the stage. “I have an announcement to make! I’ve just been notified that Alyssa Scott, our bright, shining, fearless female lead has broken her leg at an orientation meeting over the weekend. This means we will be recasting for that role and will be holding closed auditions soon. Keep an eye on the notice board for date and times!”

Whispering amongst the students and a hum of excitement filled the air as Mrs. Fitz left the stage to join Claire by the director’s desk.

“Claire, my dear. You'll be on the deciding panel along with Laoghaire and myself. We only need to fill the one role so it really shouldn't take up too much of our time.”

“Is there not an understudy for the role?” Claire asked, a little confused. “You said there is one for every lead role, correct?”

“Aye, there is,” Mrs. Fitz sighed, “but a few years ago we had a student pull out and when the understudy was promoted there was a great stramash! We created a policy after that, that dictates closed auditions must be held, limited to only the current cast of the play or musical, since they are already familiar with lines, music, and what’s been going on in rehearsals, to determine a replacement lead. An understudy will only be used for performance weekends. Now, I’ve much to do and I had best get a move on! I’ll let you know as soon as I fix a time and date.”

Mrs. Fitz bustled away and Claire looked out at the students that had gathered to one side of the stage. They were obviously very excited by the news and Malva, it seemed, was already preparing herself to audition.

“Looks like the drama’s starting a little early this spring, Sassenach.” 

“Oh?” Claire turned to find Jamie standing beside her. “What do you mean?”

“Do ye remember me telling ye about the rivalry between Malva and Ellie? You’ll get to see first hand just how bad it gets.”

Claire looked around for Ellie and spotted her in the wings, just offstage. It was evident she was just as thrilled as Malva about the news. “They can't be that bad can they?”

“Aye,” Jamie chuckled darkly. “Aye, they can.”

Two days later Claire received a note in her pigeonhole letting her know closed auditions were to be held the following Friday after class. She had just finished writing the date and time into her planner when there was a knock on her open door.

“Oh Malva, hello. How can I help you today? You're not ill, I hope!”

“Och, I just have a wee bit of a headache and wanted to ask if ye had anything that might help?” Malva closed the door behind her and sat on the empty seat across from Claire.

“Yes, of course. Let me have a look.” Claire pulled Malva’s record up on her laptop to see if there was anything she needed to take into account before giving her anything. “Is there any particular reason why you have a headache today? Have you not had much water to drink or eaten something that you don’t normally, perhaps?”

Malva shook her head gently. “I’m just so excited for my audition on Friday, I can hardly sleep for running through the choreography in my mind.”

“Ah, yes. I saw your name on the list of those auditioning. Have you ever played the lead in a school musical before?” Claire stood and moved over to the locked medicine cabinet on the wall.

“No, not yet.” Malva sighed dramatically. “It’s something I’ve been dreaming of since I was a little girl and this is my first real opportunity - the leads are almost always played by seniors. It’s hardly fair considering I’ve been working towards this my entire life while others who get the roles don't even plan on continuing theatre after graduation!”

“Here you go, this should make you feel a little better.” Claire handed her a paracetamol tablet and a disposable cup filled with water from the cooler. “Try not to let the musical stress you too much. I promise I’ll remain completely impartial during the auditions on Friday - I won’t show favouritism to anyone no matter their status within the school.”

Somehow Claire’s attempts to reassure Malva only made her more upset. She couldn't help but wonder if her headache was worse than she had admitted.

“Make sure you drink lots of water this afternoon.” Claire signed and then handed a hall pass to Malva. “Hopefully you’ll be feeling better soon.”

“Aye. Thank ye, Miss Beauchamp.”

 

\-----

 

“Mind yer ears, Sassenach.” Claire heeded Jamie’s advice and covered her ears as he used the nail gun to fix the set piece they were working on. 

She watched him work and found herself distracted by his red curls shining in the stage lights. She couldn’t help but wonder... would the chance to just run her fingers through those curls be worth fighting for? Jamie turned back suddenly, surprising her from her musings. 

“What more do we have to do before this piece is finished?” she asked in a lame attempt to pretend she wasn’t staring but simply thinking about the work ahead of them.

“Hopefully not too much,” Laoghaire appeared, placing her hand on Jamie’s bicep. “I’m so sorry to interrupt but I really need yer help Jamie.” The way she batted her lashes as she looked up at him made Claire feel somewhat ill as though she had consumed something to only have it settle in the very bottom of her gut, wrecking unwelcome havoc.

“Miss Beauchamp!” Claire turned to find Malva walking down the aisle towards her. “May I introduce ye to my father?”

Eager for the distraction, Claire smiled thankfully and hurried over.

“Miss Beauchamp,” a tall man with black hair and grey eyes held his hand out to her and she grasped it firmly. “Tom Christie. It’s a pleasure to meet ye.”

“You too,” she smiled and let go of his hand, “and please, call me Claire.”

“Allan!” Malva called and ran to meet her brother.

“Please excuse my daughter, she can be rather abrupt at times.”

“It’s no bother,” Claire smiled at Tom. “I know she’s very excited about the upcoming audition.”

“Oh, aye. She’s been talking about it non-stop. Malva says yer also the school nurse?”

“That’s correct. It’s just temporary, though, until Fiona is well enough to return. What is it that you do, Tom?”

“I’m a teacher over at St. Joseph’s Primary School. I normally teach mathematics but I’m currently head of the science department.” 

“And Mrs. Christie?”

“Oh, Allan and Malva’s mother, Mona passed many years afore. To be honest I’m not sure they even remember their mother all that well - aside from photographs they’ve seen and stories they’ve been told.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. You must be very proud of raising such wonderful children - I don’t have any of my own but I know that solo parenting comes with many challenges.”

“Aye, that it does,” Tom laughed. “Malva takes after her mother - like you wouldna believe.”

They stood in comfortable silence for a moment watching Allan and Malva with their student colleagues.

“I- I apologise if this seems a bit forward,” Tom blushed as Claire turned to look at him, “but would you like to join me for dinner tomorrow tonight?”

“Tomorrow night?” Claire repeated. She had no plans other than to curl up on the couch and watch something on Netflix... but did she really want to get dressed up and go out? She glanced over at Jamie. Laoghaire was smiling and laughing at him and they looked to be having a great time. She looked up at Tom and smiled. “That sounds lovely.”

After exchanging details, Claire left Tom to see to his children and set about packing up for the evening. Mrs. Fitz was still hard at work so she grabbed her tote and gave a small wave before heading for the exit.

“Claire!” Jamie called and she paused, turning around with one hand on the doorframe and the other on the bag straps over her shoulder. “I’ll walk ye to yer car - just give me a minute to tell the bairns I’ll be back in a few.”

Claire stepped to the side and waited patiently for Jamie to return. 

“Thank you for walking me, Jamie - you didn’t have to but thank you all the same.”

“My pleasure, Sassenach. I was actually wondering if you had any plans this weekend?”

“I do actually,” said Claire excited to share that she did, for once, have plans. “Tom asked me out to dinner.”

“Tom?? Ye mean Thomas Christie - Allan and Malva’s father?” A look came over Jamie’s face that Claire didn’t understand. Did the two have history?

“Yes, he mentioned a restaurant called  _ Standing Stones  _ that I've never been to. I'm quite excited to try it.”

“Oh, aye,” Jamie nodded. “Aye, they serve a mean 12 Hour Braised Brisket.”

“I’ll keep an eye out for it on the menu,” said Claire, practically drooling at the thought of restaurant quality Scotch Beef. Suddenly, she was very glad she had accepted Tom’s invitation. The sight of her car brought her back to the present, reminding her to fish her keys out of her bag. “Now the only the question left is what am I going to wear?”

“I’m sure ye will look bonnie in whatever you choose, Sassenach.” Jamie leaned against the hatchback as she unlocked the door. Claire noticed him run a hand through his hair, a pensive expression coming over his face. “Good night, Sassenach. I hope ye have a good time on your date and that Tom treats ye like a queen.”

“Thank you, Jamie.” Claire opened her car door and paused to look at him for a moment. “Good night.”

 

\-----

 

Claire looked up at the clock and started packing her things quickly. She had been working on reports much longer than she planned to and she knew that if she were late to the auditions, Mrs. Fitz, and especially Malva, would be in a tizzy.

The young girl seemed to be getting more and more stressed the closer it got to auditions. She had been visibly disappointed to find out that Claire and her father wouldn’t be going on any more dates together. Claire hated to disappoint her but while she had a good time on the date, it wasn’t something she was interested in repeating anytime soon. Tom was extremely nice and the conversation could be described as decent. But if she were being truly honest, Tom wasn’t the Scot she really wanted sitting across from her on a date. 

“Miss Beauchamp, quick! Ye’re needed out on the rugby field!” Harris, a student she knew to be a junior on the school’s basketball team, burst into her office, breathless and red-faced.

“Good heavens, Harris, what is the matter?” Claire said, dropping her things and grabbing her medical kit instead. 

“Ye ken there’s the big rugby game today? Well, one of the players, we think he’s been injured and needs yer help!”

“All right, please go to the auditorium and tell either Mrs. Fitz or Miss Mackenzie what’s happened and that I will be back as soon as I can!” Claire said ushering Harris out of her office so she could lock the door before making her way towards the stadium. 

As it turned out the only thing any of the rugby players were suffering from was a severe case of Chinese Whispers. When she arrived in a flurry, no doubt pink in the face and curls flying around her head, all she found were players doing their best to calm their nerves, completing their warm ups if front of a large crowd of people in the bleachers waiting for the game to start. 

After double checking with both team’s Coaches that there was no-one in need of medical attention, she turned and started to jog her way back to the auditorium. According to the clock in the hallway she was only 20 minutes late, with any luck they had waited for her.

She pulled open the doors and ran down the aisle towards the desk at the front of the theatre seats where Mrs. Fitz and Laoghaire were sitting. 

“Claire, my dear! We had just about given up on ye! Laoghaire said you had to take care of an injured player, but we didna ken how long it was going to take. I was about to start without ye!” Mrs. Fitz said as she turned towards the stage. “Students, let’s get started! Malva Christie, you’re up first!”

Claire put her things down and sat in the empty seat to the left of Mrs. Fitz. She looked up to find Malva standing on stage with her brows furrowed and a frustrated expression on her face. With a deep breath she relaxed and began the song Mrs. Fitz had chosen.

Laoghaire leaned over behind Mrs. Fitz, “Claire, I am so glad ye made it! What happened?”

“Nothing as it turns out. Clearly there was just a mix up somewhere,” Claire whispered back with a smile.

Mrs. Fitz turned towards them. “Please, lassies, I must ask that ye save your gawking and gabbing for later and focus on the task at hand, eh?”

“Of course, Mrs. Fitz, I apologize.”

They turned back to the stage committed to focusing on the auditions.

 

\-----

 

“You performed splendidly, Ellie, truly. Your voice is so strong and you carry the emotions of the character so well! It’s clear you didn’t get your singing talent from your Uncle Jamie.” Claire laughed at her own joke. She and Ellie had both stayed behind to clean up and it felt nice to have some quiet time after that afternoon’s drama. 

“Oh aye,” Ellie chuckled as she stacked the remaining chair into the corner. “Poor Uncle Jamie does love music but he canna carry a tune in a bucket! Ye really think I have a chance?”

“Well... I promised not to show any favoritism or give away anything too soon but I can definitely say that you have an excellent chance of being the lead.” Claire told her. 

“It’s good to hear ye say so, Miss Beauchamp. It would be my first lead role and I can’t even think about how excited I would be if I get it! But I ken Malva is a favorite of Miss Laoghaire’s, so I will have some competition there, for sure.”

“But surely with Laoghaire’s connection to your family through your Uncle, you must be a favourite of hers too, no?”

“What do ye mean? Which uncle? Uncle Jamie?! They arena close! Not as close as she’d like to be. At least that’s what my Aunt Rachel says,” Ellie said snickering.

“Aren’t they dating?” Claire asked confused.

“Of course not! Where did ye hear that from?”

“Oh, I… I don’t know where I got that idea,” said Claire trying to keep a straight face. “Mrs. Fitz said we would be announcing who has the role by Monday, so you only have the weekend to worry and fret over it.” 

“That’s good, I guess. Are you heading to the game? You can walk over with me if you want to!” Ellie offered.

“Oh, I actually have a lot of work to do sorting through reports and making notes for Mrs. fitz for the musical. I have plans to head over to the little coffee shop I’ve fallen in love that’s on the corner and finish it all there.” 

“Tis a pity, Sassenach,” said Jamie as he walked into the auditorium. “I was hoping you would be free to help cheer on Robbie at the game.” 

“Uncle Jamie!” Ellie ran over to him excitedly. “Auditions went so well! I was nervous, but I finished my song and read the lines just the way I’d practiced!”

“That is good to hear, Ellie! Yer hard work is going to pay off, I ken it!” Jamie wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug.

“Thanks, Uncle Jamie! I’m going to head on to the game before I miss any more of it. See you there, Nunkie! Miss Beauchamp, good luck with your work and I’ll see you Monday!” Ellie shouted running towards the door.

“She didn’t even stop to see if you wanted to walk with her!” Claire laughed.

‘Aye, ye kind of get used to the bairns being too busy to spend time with their seniors at some point. It’s one of the reasons why I help out with school events - it gives them no choice in the matter.” Jamie gave her one of his trademark owlish winks. “Actually, I came here to ask ye a question.”

“Me?” She asked stupidly considering they were the only two people in the auditorium.

“Aye,” Jamie smiled. “I was hoping to invite ye to spend some time with me this weekend. I’m going to be making the drive up to Lallybroch Farms tomorrow and I was wondering if ye’d like to join me? I’ll understand if ye have plans with Tom again, of course. I thought I would extend the offer just in case.”

“No, I have no future plans with Tom,” Claire shook her head and smiled, watching a smile form on Jamie’s face to match her own. “I would love to accompany you, Jamie.” 

_ It would be my absolute pleasure,  _ she thought.


	6. Bet On It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire spends some quality time with Jamie outside of school and learns some very interesting things about him.

Claire fidgeted nervously with her hands and tried to distract herself by smoothing out the non-existent creases in her faded blue denim jeans. She had no idea why she was feeling so nervous. On every other occasion she had spent time with Jamie she had felt relaxed and comfortable. But when Jamie had pulled up outside her apartment in his white dual cab sporting the Lallybroch Farms logo she was overtaken by butterflies in her stomach that were still yet to dissipate. 

“I hope ye dinna mind, Sassenach, but I have to make a quick stop before we make the drive out to the Farm. Jenny usually takes pity on me and feeds me when I’m in Inverness and I dinna keep much food stocked at home. There's a couple of ingredients I will need to buy before I can make ye dinner later.”

“So, what you’re trying to tell me is that you don't do much cooking and I should probably be scared of what I’m going to be fed today?” Claire teased, incredibly thankful for the distraction from her thoughts.

“I guess you will have to wait to find out, aye?” Jamie said blinking owlishly at her and the butterflies only multiplied.

Jamie pulled up to a grocery store sporting a large ‘IGS’ sign across the front. He got out of the vehicle and made his way to her side of the truck. 

“IGS? What does that stand for?” She asked Jamie as he held out his hand to help her out of the vehicle.

“Independent Grocers of Scotland.” Jamie explained as they walked into the grocery store. “It’s no’ as popular as some of the bigger supermarkets chains, but it supports the smaller businessman and is a favourite with the locals.” 

“So what are we shopping for today?” Claire asked as she picked up a red shopping basket. “A quick microwaveable meal? Perhaps a pizza that we can pop in the oven?”

“Ah, clever lass. We  _ are _ having pizza, though not from a box. I’m talking handmade pizzas. We have to do it right, aye? I just have to pick up the cheese and some ingredients for a fresh salad. Everything else is already out at the farm.” 

 

\---------

 

Conversation flowed easily as Jamie drove them through the Highlands and they arrived at Lallybroch much sooner than she had expected. She wasn’t sure if time had flown by or had actually ceased to exist at all. Deciding not to ponder the thought, she opened the door and hopped out of the truck.

“Och, Sassenach. I was just about to open that for ye!”

“I didn’t want to get  _ too _ spoiled with you opening my door for me all the time or, even worse, for you to think I couldn’t take care of myself.”

“Och, I ken yer not the meek and obedient type, Sassenach. I’d never make that mistake,” Jamie replied.

“I’m glad,” Claire smiled and reached into the bed of the truck to grab one of the bags of groceries out of the cooler.

Jamie, grabbing the other, and lead the way inside the building. “Welcome to my home, Sassenach.” 

“This is your  _ house _ ? It’s the size of a castle!” Claire looked down the dark hallway. “I’d be afraid ghosts would haunt me living in this house all alone!” 

“Weel, I dinna ken anything about ghosts but I can tell ye Murtagh and Fergus like to haunt me wi’ their loud noises and clamoring about at all hours of the day and night.”

“Murtagh and Fergus?” Claire placed her bag of groceries down on the kitchen bench next to Jamie’s.

“Aye, my godfather and a young lad who help me run the farm. We make use of the manor house all year round but I assure you it’s a lot more lively during the holidays when the entire family is home.” Jamie said, opening the fridge and putting the perishables inside. “Let me put these away for later and I’ll show ye around the homestead. There’s a bit of work ye can help me get done today.” 

“Oh, I thought you were asking me on a date but really it was just an excuse to get an extra helping hand for the day,” Claire crossed her arms across her chest and tilted her head. “I see how it is.” 

“Aye, that’s it. I asked you out here because I needed the extra help mucking out the stables. Definitely no’ because I wanted to spend the day with the pretty lass who has managed to catch my eye since I was a 17 year old lad.” Jamie smirked at her.

Claire dropped her arms back to her sides and laughed. “Well, so long as you’re honest about your intentions, Mr. Fraser.”

“Alright then, to the stables,” Jamie said, taking her hand.

As they got closer, the smell of hay and horses grew stronger reminding her of days when she was younger and would visit a nearby farm with her father. 

“So, what is it you need to do today, Jamie? Surely you weren’t being serious about mucking out the stables?” She asked, extremely glad she had decided upon jeans, shirt and boots that morning - just in case he was. 

“On your first visit, Sassenach? Nay, that task is reserved only for farm hands. Maybe next time if yer really desperate to give it a go,” Jamie joked as they entered the stable. “Today I just need to take a ride around the property and check on everything. Would ye help me brush down Donas and get him ready? I’ve a horse for ye, too, if ye ken how to ride.”

“Sadly, even though I love horses, I never did learn to ride.”

“Well, we will have to see to it you get proper riding lessons. It’s bad enough yer a Sassenach but also one who canna ride?” Jamie shook his head dramatically. “Although I dinna mind sharing Donas with ye for now.”

Claire admired the black stallion’s healthy coat as Jamie equipped him with a bridle and then mounted him smoothly.

“Bareback?” She asked.

“Aye, if we’re riding together a saddle will only get in the way - and Donas might have a verra strong opinion about it, ken?” Claire stepped up onto a large piece of wood and accepted Jamie’s help to pull her up to sit in front of him. “Dinna fash, just hang on and try not to kick Donas - or me - and I’ll do the rest.”

He put his arms around her to reach for the reigns and tapped the horse with his heels lightly, encouraging Donas to exit the stable. Claire was hyper aware of Jamie’s body behind her own but as they made their way to the boundary of Lallybroch farm lands she found herself relaxing into it. It was obvious they were following a path Jamie and Donas had travelled together many a times. Jamie rarely instructed the stallion and despite Donas’ obvious strength they kept a consistent and surprisingly gentle pace.

“So, how exactly does Lallybroch Farms work? This is only one farm yet the name refers to plural?” She twisted to look back at him. “Do you have more?”

“No,” Jamie laughed. “I run only the one farm but my company, Lallybroch Farms, invests money in farms both in and around Lallybroch and in return the company receives a small percentage of the profit. Not much, mind. Just enough to assist with machinery, property and building maintenance, provide everyone with comprehensive insurance and keep the company moving forward."

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just provide farmers with the money, rather than be so intimately involved?” Claire asked.

"I dinna ken how much you understand about Scots, Sassenach, but we're a proud people - willing to work hard and earn every penny that falls into our pocket. To offer financial help outright would not only be offensive but perhaps even lead to me being outcast!" Jamie laughed. "Individually, small farms like these can’t compete with the big state and nationwide suppliers but collectively, there’s a real chance. Lallybroch Farms has even managed to gain a contract with the Independent Grocers of Scotland to provide regular shipments of fresh produce. Nae, money isn’t everything and the best way to help local farmers is to support them in as many ways as possible.” 

“Ah, got it,” Claire nodded. “So, how did you go from International Rugby Star to running Lallybroch Farms in the Highlands? That seems like an awfully big change.”

Jamie reined Donas to a stop and dismounted. He tied the stallion to a nearby tree and held out his hands to help Claire join him on solid ground.

“I’m not sure ye have the time nor the patience required for such a long story, Sassenach.” Jamie walked to the wooden fence and wrapped his hands around the top panel, gripping hard as he looked out at the empty field. “It’s not exactly a joyous one.”

Claire approached him slowly and placed one hand over his.

“I want to know everything about you, Jamie,” Claire assured him. “The good  _ and _ the bad.”

Suddenly Jamie pulled his hand out from under hers, leapt over the fence and turned to look at her with a brow raised.

Claire simply stared at him and he smirked.

“Come on, I'll tell ye as we walk.”

Unsure of where they were going (or why), Claire walked beside him but made sure to remain one step behind.

“My mam got sick, ken? Diagnosed with cancer in my senior year. I suppose ye have some knowledge of cancer being a doctor and all?” Jamie glanced at her and she nodded. Whilst it wasn't her area of expertise, she came across patients with cancer all too often. “Jenny was in her second year at university but she quit school and came home to help, particularly with Robert who was only nine at the time - and me too, I suppose. My da, he… wasn’t handling Mam’s diagnosis verra well - it’s almost like he was desperate to focus on the good things in our lives.”

“And that included you playing rugby?” Claire guessed.

“Aye,” Jamie nodded. “He kept telling me not to worry about helping out at home, to just focus on training hard and applying for scholarships to university. I wasn't going to argue with him. I figured that if I could not only get a scholarship but drafted, I would be able to help out Mam and Da financially. Mam passed away about two years after her diagnosis and that was when I really put all my time and energy into the sport. It paid off - I ended up making it onto the international team.”

“I imagine your father was very proud,” said Claire as they rounded up the hill.

“Aye. Which was why having to retire so suddenly from the game upset me greatly. Not because of the sport itself, ken? I never loved rugby, not truly. Having to call Da and let him know…” Jamie paused and took a deep breath. “The same day I was having surgery on my hand, he suffered a stroke. I ken there’s no direct link between the two but I canna help but feel like it was my fault.”

Claire slipped her hand into his. Even though she had medical knowledge that she could share with Jamie to prove him wrong, that it wasn’t his fault, she knew that it took far more than a few medical terms to heal one’s soul.

“This is what I wanted to show ye, Sassenach.” 

They stopped at the top of the hill and Claire shielded her eyes from glare of the sun. From where they were standing she could see farmland for miles, with homes and farm sheds scattered here and there.

“It’s… beautiful.” 

“Aye, ‘tis. But it didna look like this when I returned home.”

“What do you mean?”

“I was lost after I retired. I had spent all of my adult life focusing on the game and I came to realise that I didn’t know who I was without it. I stayed in the city for a while. I had money from my career and wasn't in any rush to find another job. I was miserable so eventually I decided to return to Lallybroch and I saw firsthand just how tough life in the Highlands had become. National and international companies had monopolized the market and the local economy was dying. All these people who had helped our family through the worst of times were now struggling and I knew I had to do something. I committed to putting my Business Degree to use and started Lallybroch Farms. It’s ended up becoming somewhat of a family project and so much bigger than I ever expected.”

“It must be so wonderful to have such a large family. Growing up as an only child, living and working on a farm in the Highlands surrounded by family sounds like a dream come true,” Claire admitted.

“More like a nightmare, some days.” Jamie snorted. “When our mother got sick Jenny took over as family matriarch and never really stopped. Since my returning to Lallybroch she’s decided to help me settle down and start a family of my own.”

“To be honest, I believed you were in a relationship will Laoghaire until just recently,” Claire admitted slightly embarrassed to have made the assumption without question.

“Hmph,” Jamie grunted, “if Jenny had her way I would be. She’s so damn stubborn when it comes to helping family - whether said family wants her help or no’. God help her bairns when they come of age.”

Claire laughed out loud at the thought. “I’d be even more worried for their perspective spouses.”

“Come on, Sassenach,” Jamie smiled at her. “Donas will be wondering where we are.”

The sun was starting to set by the time they made it back to the stables and settled Donas in for the night. Claire shivered and rubbed her hands up and down her arms in an attempt to emulate the warmth she had felt being so close to Jamie. It was obvious Jamie was pleased having found nothing amiss during the day but if she was truthful she wouldn’t have minded if they had needed to stay out longer. 

“Come on, Sassenach. Let’s go inside where it’s warm and get started on that pizza.”

 

\---------

 

The glass of wine she consumed while sitting and watching Jamie cook dinner had not only warmed her but left her with a buzz that could absolutely be blamed on not having eaten much that day. She now sat next to Jamie on the porch, a tartan throw wrapped around her shoulders over the top of her coat and a second glass of wine in hand.

“Cheers, Jamie. To a successful day,” She lifted her glass towards him.

“Cheers, Sassenach.” His glass met hers and he took a sip. “Now, let’s dig in to this wonderful dinner we prepared, eh?”

“I didn’t do much in the way of preparing  _ or  _ cooking,” Claire laughed. “Which… is probably a good thing. I’m confident in the OR with a surgical knife in my hand, but not so much in the kitchen.” 

“Do ye miss it?” Jamie asked as he served each of them another slice.

“The OR or Boston?”

“Both.” Jamie took a bite and swallowed. “Being the school nurse in little Inverness surely canna compare to the business of a surgeon and the excitement of Boston.”

“To be quite honest, I don’t miss it as much as I thought I would. I do miss Joe Abernathy, though. People liked to call us the ‘Dream Team’,” she chuckled thinking of the first time someone had called them that, “I don’t know that we necessarily deserved that title, but it  _ was _ a dream to get to work with someone who was both a good friend and a colleague I could trust. He and his wife, Gail, have been there for me so many times through the years - through many ups and downs. So, while I don’t miss work or Boston all that much I do miss them.” 

Claire looked out at the stars peeking through the clouds as she finished her slice and turned to look at Jamie.  

“I also have to admit that Inverness and the people here are creeping into my heart in a way I truly never expected.” 

“I’m verra glad to hear that, Sassenach.” Jamie looked at her for a moment and reached over to touch her cheek. “I’m sorry, ye have just have...”

She leaned in towards Jamie and gently brushed her lips against his. He smelled of fresh herbs but so, she assumed, did she. She felt Jamie move his hand to tangle it in her hair and-

“Milord, did you want me to - oh mon dieu! Pardon me, I…” A young man with dark curly hair stood on the porch obviously faltering for words having not expected to find Jamie with anyone.

“‘Tis alright Fergus,” said Jamie with a stern look that Claire interpreted as a message the two would be having a rather unpleasant conversation later on. “I best be getting ye home anyway, Sassenach. It’s getting late and we have a good drive back.”

“Can I help with cleaning up the dinner dishes and such?” Claire asked, rising to her feet.

“Nay, Fergus can clear them for us,” Jamie said looking over at Fergus, clearly meaning to make him suffer for his ill timed interruption. “Can’t ye, Fergus?”

“Of course, Milord. Right away,” Fergus agreed beginning to hastily clean off the table. 

Jamie waited for her to gather her bag before leading her towards his truck. “Désolé,” Claire saw Fergus mouth to Jamie with a pained look on his face as they walked past and she couldn’t help but smile.

 

\--------

 

The drive back to her apartment in Inverness was in comfortable silence. She was pleasantly tired from the day and didn’t think twice about leaning over and laying her head on Jamie’s shoulder as he drove. 

Jamie stretched out his arm and put it around her as she settled in closer. “Thank ye fer helping me today, Sassenach. It was the best day I’ve had on the Farm in a long time. I hope ye enjoyed it.”

“I did, Jamie.” said Claire as she closed her eyes. “Maybe we can do it again, soon?”

“Ye can bet on it, Sassenach.”


	7. The Boys Are Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the Easter holidays and Jamie’s old rugby mates, Rupert and Angus, are back in town.

"AAAAHHHHHH!!!"

A high pitched scream of indignation reverberated down the hallway to her office and Claire barely even twitched at the sound. Nothing could dampen her mood since her visit to Lallybroch Farms over the weekend - not even Malva's reaction to seeing the casting list on the noticeboard outside Mrs. Fitz's office. When making the decision to promote former understudy Lisa Campbell to lead and have Ellie fill the role of understudy to the lead, they knew it wouldn’t be well received by all. But Mrs. Fitz was certain Malva would not even entertain the thought of being understudy to someone else, that she would much rather be on stage playing a supporting role. With Malva it was ‘all or nothing’ and it seemed on this occasion nothing would be all she would get. Ellie on the other hand, was extremely excited at the news.

“Miss Beauchamp! Miss Beauchamp!” Ellie appeared in the doorway of Claire’s office. “I’m now understudy to the lead! You and Uncle Jamie were right - I shouldn’t have been so worried! This is going to be such good practice for next year. Maybe when I’m a senior I might even get the lead!”

“I-” Claire stood up from her desk and started to walk over to Ellie and offer her congratulations but stopped when Ellie promptly ran off down the hall - presumably to tell her friends of the good news.

Claire smiled and sat back down in her chair, which hurt more than it should have. She was under the impression her consistent running schedule had kept her in pretty good shape but clearly riding a horse was a different form of exercise all together.  _ Completely worth it, though, _ she thought to herself as she stretched her legs under the desk.  _ And something I wouldn’t hesitate to do again. _

Despite Malva’s mood and Jamie’s warning of impending drama due to closed auditions, the entire school body seemed to be in a joyous mood. Easter Holidays were due to start that Friday and everyone, including the faculty, was looking forward to some extended time off campus. Claire had been invited to join Mrs. Graham for morning service followed by a roast lamb dinner at Reverend Wakefield’s manse. Although not a regular church goer, Claire had been raised Catholic and attended many a service prior to the death of her parents and the decision to accept Mrs. Graham’s invitation had been an easy one. The thought of a home cooked meal made with both love and care (something Claire was undeniably incapable of doing) was an added bonus. She had been enjoying her time alone in Scotland so far but sometimes even the most independent need a little time with family and friends. Something, she discovered that afternoon, not everyone agreed upon.

Claire was in the staff room making a cup of tea when the school’s resident cooking teacher, Joseph Boswell Murray, approached Laoghaire who was sitting at the table having a late lunch.

“What is it, Joseph?” Laoghaire asked without even looking up at him.

“Hello, Laoghaire,” said Joseph with a smile. “I was wondering if ye had any plans during the Easter break?”

“Aye, I’ll be going home to Broch Mordha for the weekend to spend time with family.”

“Do ye think when ye return to Inverness ye-, what I mean to ask is, would ye like to join me for dinner one evening? I assure ye I make a mean creme brulee.”

Laoghaire packed up her now empty container and cutlery and stood to look Joseph up and down. “Ew! Creme brulee? Are ye daft, Joseph? I’m a vegan, ye ken?”

Claire couldn’t help but observe Joseph as Laoghaire swept out of the room. It was almost like he wasn’t phased at all by her behaviour… or perhaps he was just used to it, she figured.  

The ringing of the school bell reminded her that there was much work to be done before Thursday afternoon and picked up her mug.

“I’m sorry, Joe.” She offered him in lieu of anything else she could possibly say.

“Dinna fash, Claire. I’m used to it wi’ her, ken?” He assured her with a wink.

“Well I hope you have a good holiday, just the same.” Claire said with a smile back and a sympathetic pat on the shoulder on her way out the door.

 

\-----

 

Claire wiped the sweat from her forehead and re-adjusted her headphones. A long run through the streets of Inverness was exactly what she needed after a week of gorging herself on more homemade food than she had eaten in the last year. Easter Sunday had been a pleasant day. The congregation that had gathered at Old Church of Inverness were extremely welcoming and lunch at Reverend Wakefield’s afterwards had been even more enjoyable than expected. The Reverend's young nephew, Roger, had provided much entertainment over the three course meal, first by retelling some of his favourite highland folk stories and then performing a new song on the bodhran he had learnt especially for the occasion. Mrs. Graham had sent her home with a dozen containers full of leftovers that ended up filling both her fridge and her freezer once she had carried them all inside her apartment.

Thinking back on it, Claire hadn’t been in much of a position to decline the offer to take home leftovers even if she had wanted to. Towards the end of her visit, she and Mrs. Graham had sat down in the kitchen for a quiet cup of tea -  Oolong specifically because “It's best for the readings” the woman had assured her. Having no stock in such things Claire had remained completely unphased until the woman had studied what remained in her cup.

“There’s a curved leaf, which indicates a journey, but it’s crossed by a broken one - which means staying put. And there are strangers there, to be sure. Several of them, And one of them’s your husband, if I read the leaves aright.” Mrs. Graham had told her and Claire had tried her best not to react but the words had remained on her mind ever since.

“Claire!”

Claire pulled both her thoughts and her feet to a stop and found Jamie waving at her from the middle of the community rugby field. She had been so deep in thought she hadn’t even realised she was this close to home.

“Jamie!” She called back with a smile, pulling out her headphones. She leaned against the short fence in an attempt to slow her heart rate as Jamie jogged towards her. Today he was dressed in shorts and a long sleeve t-shirt with his red curls tied back off his face. It wasn't a look she had ever seen him in but she found she didn't mind the sight at all. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Aye, I ken. That was the third time I called yer name!”

Claire stared at him for a moment. “Liar,” she accused and he laughed. “I might have had headphones in but I play my music only on low in case of traffic. What are you doing here anyway? I’m surprised you’re not up at Lallybroch right now.”

“I was, but I got word that the boys are back in town,” Jamie nodded his head to the men still playing on the field, “and I couldna miss the opportunity to remind them how to play, ken?”

“Remind  _ us _ how to play?” A tall man with brown hair wearing a worn out black and light blue t-shirt sporting the slogan ‘We Are Warriors’ came up to sling an arm around Jamie’s shoulders. “Who exactly are ye tryin’ to impress?”

“Och, it’s ye that’s always trying to impress everyone, aye?”

Jamie shrugged the man off and they began to play fight with another. Claire watched as a much shorter and skinnier, man ran and jumped on top them both, all three of them completely oblivious of her presence until she coughed into her hand.

“Claire,” Jamie brushed off his sleeves and stood tall once again. “Let me introduce ye to Rupert MacKenzie and Angus Mhor. We played for UofE together back in the day.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you both,” Claire said with a smile and a nod at the men.

The shorter man that had been introduced as Angus moved forward and held out his hand to her. “You too, lass.”

“I’m guessing your surname is more of a moniker than a family tradition?” Claire asked as she shook the man’s hand.

“Aye, lass. And it doesna refer to my height either,” Angus waggled his tongue at her and she pulled her hand out of his in disgust.

“Dinna be crass, ye numpty. Unlike  _ some _ people here, I ken how to behave in front of a lady.” Rupert pushed Angus back and held out his own hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet ye, Claire.”

Claire glanced at Jamie before accepting Rupert’s hand. She thought very highly of Jamie so she didn’t think she should doubt his choice in friends - too much.

A whistle sounded from the field and they all turned to look at the remaining men in the middle of the field. “Are you fellas gonna play or what??”

“AYE!” Rupert yelled as he and Angus jogged back to the game.

“I’m so sorry, Sassenach. Unfortunately I have no control over them - I have tried, I promise ye.”

“It’s fine,” Claire laughed. “At least now I know what I’m dealing with.”

“FRASER!” Someone else yelled trying to get Jamie’s attention.

“Verra true, Sassenach. Listen,” Jamie rubbed the stubble on his face with the palm of his hand. “Would ye… be interested in staying for a bit? I really need to get back to the game but we won’t be playing for much longer.”

“Absolutely.” Claire smiled. “Do me a favour and make sure Angus gets tackled at some point before the end of the game?”

“You got it, Sassenach.”

Claire made a point to stretch her muscles before taking a seat in the stands - she still needed to get home yet and the last thing she needed was stiff limbs. From her chosen place overlooking the field she could tell, despite her limited knowledge of the game, they were all very good players. Yet, the only one she had eyes for was Jamie. She watched as he moved across the green so smoothly it was like the play was almost orchestrated with his opponents beforehand. It was evident that he still possessed the strength and grace that had landed him on the international team years ago and watching him play made her wish she could have seen him in his prime. It wasn’t long before the game finished up and Jamie walked up the steps towards her. 

“Thank you for waiting, Sassenach.” He dropped his sports bag on the bench seat in front of Claire, pulling on a hooded sweatshirt before taking a seat beside her.

“It was worth it just to see Angus go down like that,” Claire joked. “So, how have your holidays been?”

“Wonderful - and busy. Robert came home from grad school for the long weekend so it was busier than usual up at Lallybroch if ye can imagine that. But, it’s great having him home. I just wish he could've stayed longer but I ken I should be glad we got to see him at all.” Jamie wiped the sweat from his face with a towel.  “What about you, Sassenach?”

“It was lovely. The best Easter I’ve had in a number of years, actually. I ate  _ way _ too much but I have no regrets at all.”

“Sounds like ye had a quality Scots experience and I’m glad,” Jamie laughed. “I was thinking about ye over the weekend. I regretted not inviting ye to spend Easter with us, especially since I ken ye dinna have any family here to spend it with.”

“You were thinking about me?” Claire’s lack of family was nothing new, it was in fact something she had gotten used to, but she couldn’t deny the feeling that came over her hearing those words come of Jamie’s mouth.

“Aye,” Jamie blushed. “I normally get to see ye every few days and I’ve missed yer face this past week. I was glad to at least talk to ye, though. Thank goodness for texting, aye?”

Claire nodded, thinking of the night before last where she had laid in bed til the early hours of the morning chatting with Jamie via text.

“Anyway, I asked ye to stay til after the game because I wanted to ye invite ye to come out to The High Hill with us tonight - if yer free? I would love to hear all about this amazing Easter ye had and maybe ye would have the opportunity to see the good side of the boys that I see.”

“I would like that very much, Jamie.” Claire felt a smile creep onto her face but otherwise tried to remain calm. “But I must ask… what is The High Hill?” 

“Och, it’s this great little pub on the other side of town that serves some of the best local brew on tap. Let me put the address in yer phone, Sassenach, and I’ll see ye there at 8?”

 

\-----

 

Claire wasn't normally a fan of making last minute plans but she found she didn’t mind so much when said last minute plans gave her the chance to spend more time with Jamie. Plus after a week of wearing nothing other than denim jeans and sweaters or workout wear she found it fun to get dressed up. Assuming the dress code would be the same as if she were back in Boston, she put on the new tartan plaid button up shirt dress she had purchased from the cute little boutique near her apartment earlier in the week and pulled on her brown knee high boots to match. She took one final glance in the mirror and checked her hair that she had spent way too much time trying to tame with a curling iron only to now have seconds thoughts at her efforts. 

“Don’t overthink it, Beauchamp.” she told herself as she used the pad of her finger to pat down her matte lipstick. “There’s no time to fix it anyway.”

 

\-----

 

Walking in the front door of The High Hill she was happy to find out she needn't have spent so much time stressing over her appearance. The pub was bustling with patrons all dressed similarly in what she would describe as smart-casual. There was an open fire on the wall to the left and Claire shrugged off her coat as she walk through looking for Jamie. On the other side of the pool table she spotted the mop of red curls that she was getting to know so well. Jamie, Angus and Rupert were each standing around a small round table with a glass of beer in hand and a half empty jug of beer in the middle. 

“Is there a spare glass for me?” She asked as slid in the space between Jamie and Rupert. 

“Sassenach, ye made it!” Jamie picked up a clean glass and filled it for her. “See if this is to yer taste- if not I’ll go and order ye something from the bar.”

Claire accepted the glass and sniffed its contents before taking a sip. “Mmm...this will do just fine. Points to you for picking a good brew, Fraser. Have you all been here long?”

“Nay, only long enough to claim a table and order a round.”

By the time Claire had finished her glass she had not only relaxed but found herself getting along well with both Rupert and Angus. Despite their introductions earlier that day, it was becoming obvious that they were both good men who not only cared about Jamie but also knew how to make him laugh. She was getting to see a side of Jamie that had never presented itself around her before. 

“Excuse me for a moment,” Jamie finished off his glass and reached into his pocket for a couple of notes which he placed on the table. “I’m in need of the restroom. Order another round while I’m gone?”

“I’ll get them,” Claire offered and made her way to the bar. 

“Ye must be quite the lass, Claire.” said Rupert as she returned to the table with their next round.

“Hmm?”

“It’s been a long time since Jamie’s brought a lass with him to a night out with the boys.”

“He doesna trust us not to catch the lass’ eye, aye?” Angus winked.

“Och, ye couldna steal a woman from any man in this pub even if ye tried, ye fool!”

“So, Jamie’s never introduced you to a woman before?” Claire interrupted their bickering and brought them back to the topic she was far more interested in discussing.

“Oh, we’ve met many o’ Jamie’s lasses, but never twice if ye ken my meaning?”

“Aye,” Angus snorted. “Jamie always had a reputation fer wooing the ladies but never for keeping them.”

Suddenly Angus’ face contorted and Claire looked around the room for what might have been the cause. Over his shoulder she spotted a group of men talking and laughing in Gaelic, a few of them glancing in their direction.

“Do you know them?” Claire asked.

“Nay, but I think it’s time we introduced ourselves. I willna be a moment.” Angus placed his glass down on the table and Claire watched as he turned around, walked over to the group of men and promptly punched one of them in the face.

Claire stood stunned for a moment, watching the men stand up from the table as Rupert went to aid Angus in his quest.  

Someone grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the way of the fight that was gathering momentum by the second. She turned to find a older man with black eyes framed by a pair of round glasses and gray hair swept away from his face. Despite having never met the man before she had a distinct feeling she needn't worry about him making any untoward advances and the two of them watched quietly as Jamie and another man appeared and forcibly broke up the brawl.

“What is it they're shouting over there?” Claire asked the man beside her. “I’m sorry. I don’t know any Gaelic.” 

“I think it’s best it remains that way, my dear,” the man patted her arm. “At least for now.”

Jamie roughly escorted both Angus and Rupert out the door only to return and scour the crowd. Once he spotted her in the corner he made his way over.

“Claire! Are ye alright?” Claire nodded and watched Jamie turn to the man who still had a hand on her arm. “Thank ye, Ned.”

“Dinna fash, lad. Claire here gave me a good excuse to step out of the way, ken?” Ned let go and pushed his glasses back up his nose. “I'm far too auld to be getting involved in bar fights these days.”

“Ye underestimate yerself, Ned, but thank ye all the same. I'm going to go and talk with the owner and see if I can sort this out. Will ye be alright for a moment?” Jamie asked turning back to Claire.

“I'll be fine,” Claire assured him. “I'm not so sure about Rupert and Angus, though. I'll go check on them.”

Claire stood in front of the two men and looked at them sternly as they sat themselves down on the stone wall outside the pub. It was lucky she always carried a small medical kit in her handbag and there happened to be enough light coming from the street lamp for her to assess their injuries.

“One split lip, one bloody nose and five smashed knuckles,” Claire counted out loud.

“And my ribs hurt a bit,” Angus added.

“Bastard’s fingernail was sharp as a boar’s tooth.” Rupert complained. “He’s gouged a hole in me!”

“Oh, shush. I’ve tended six year olds braver than you lot, honestly.”

“Ye dinna need to hurt our pride too, lass. I think we’ve suffered enough tonight.”

“Aye,” Angus agreed. “Especially since it was you we were defending.”

“Me??” Claire nearly dropped the bandage out of her hand but caught herself just in time.

“Aye. Yer special to Jamie which means we can insult ye, but God help any other man that does.”

Claire stood there dumbfounded for a moment before she turned to watch Jamie exit the pub and join them outside.

“I’ve convinced Dougal not to call the police,” Jamie explained and the tension around the group dissipated.

“How did you manage that?” Claire asked incredulously.

“Dougal used to be our rugby coach once upon a time, ken?”

“He’s also Jamie’s uncle,” Rupert added.

“Aye, that too. So long as we make ourselves scarce for a bit there willna be any trouble. He’s already called you two a cab to take ye home and I hope you dinna mind, Sassenach, I’ve asked him to call a second one for us.”

“Us?”

“Aye, I’ll escort you to yer front door and then head home myself. If ye’ll allow it, o’ course.”

“Of course I will. Thank you, Jamie...it’s very kind of you.” 

It wasn't long before the first taxi arrived on the curb. A quick farewell to Angus and Rupert that included a reminder of how to take care of their injuries as minor as they were and Jamie was soon holding open the door for her to enter a taxi of their own. She gave her address to the driver as Jamie climbed in after her.

“I'm sorry for the way the night ended, Sassenach.” Jamie apologised sheepishly. “When I invited ye to join us for a drink I never imagined it would end in a near brawl. Are ye sure ye didna get hurt in the stramash?”

“There’s no need to apologize, Jamie. Both my physical self  _ and _ my honour remain intact - I’ve had worse nights working night shift at the hospital I assure you.” Claire reached out and put her hand on top of his. “If you were to ever invite me for an evening out again I would gladly accept.”

“Oh, aye?”

“Aye,” Claire mimicked just to see him laugh.

The taxi pulled up in front of her apartment and Claire let go of his hand to unbuckle her seatbelt.

“Thank you, Jamie, for escorting me home.” Claire opened the door and stepped out onto the sidewalk. “I had fun, despite the way things ended.”

“I’m glad. Ah-” Jamie glanced nervously at the driver as the man cleared his throat a second time. “Goodnight, Sassenach.”

“Goodnight, Jamie.” 

Unlocking and opening her door, she turned back to wave at the man who was slowly breaking down her walls and creeping into her heart. 


	8. Can I Have This Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire volunteers to chaperone the school dance.

It was the night of all nights.  ****  
** **

Glowing lanterns hung from the ceiling and what seemed like millions of fairy lights were strung up everywhere the eye could see. A real tree had been placed in the very center of the basketball court and wrapped in glittering lights. How they had managed to literally bring the outdoors in, she didn’t know but she wasn’t complaining. All of it absolutely took her breath away. ****  
** **

It had been a long time since Claire had attended a school dance and while she had never attended one at North High, standing in the gymnasium brought back so many memories. The time she attended school at Belmont Preparatory and her fellow student Bobby attempted to kiss her without her consent and ended up sprawled out on the dance floor for his troubles, or the time she attended St. John’s and was on the planning committee. Her suggestion to host a Sadie Hawkins dance had been shot down but it had been fun organising all the same. ****  
** **

When the school principal, Mr. Morrison, had asked at the staff meeting earlier in the week for volunteers to chaperone, Claire had happily put her hand up. Not only was she available, it would be good for the school nurse to attend in case of any medical emergencies. That’s what she told both herself and anyone who asked, anyway. The real reason she volunteered was the thought of attending a dance with Jamie. Hoping that his uncle-duties also covered dances, she pulled out her phone and texted him after the meeting was over to see. ****  
** **

_ I think I’ve been spending too much time with you - I’ve started volunteering for all the school events. _ ****  
** **

_ Ah, Sassenach, let me guess… school dance chaperone? _ ****  
** **

_ How did you know? Lol.  _ ****  
** **

_ My name is always automatically added as chaperone each year so I knew it was about that time. Chaperones aren’t really allowed to take a date, or else I’d ask ye to be mine. _ ****  
** **

_ It’s alright, it won’t be hard to find me. I’ll be the old lady in the ridiculous dress ;) _ ****  
** **

_ Ye could never look ridiculous, Sassenach. See you Saturday. _ ****  
** **

She looked down at the corsage on her wrist and smiled. It had been delivered to her apartment a few hours before the dance along with a note that read: ****  
** **

_ Sassenach. This is for all the dances we never had a chance to attend together. See you soon. Jamie _ ****  
** **

While she didn't expect to spend a lot of time with Jamie tonight, she was excited all the same. She nervously brushed her hands down the front of her dress. When she had volunteered to be chaperone, it hadn’t even crossed her mind that she would need to choose something appropriate to wear for a formal dance. Luckily, Mrs. Fitz had caught her before she could head back to her office. The woman had forcibly taken her to the costume department explaining that the spring musical theme two years ago had showcased the years in high school including prom night and there were “prom dresses galore” for Claire to choose from.  ****  
** **

Insisting that Claire should enjoy her “school girl figure” before she turned 40, the woman had thrust a collection of dresses in her arms and instructed her to choose one she liked. ****  
** **

_ “My dear, I knew you wouldn’t have a thing that is proper formal dance attire with you, and we can’t having you look like a sad sack of rags now, can we?” _ Mrs. Fitz had said. ****  
** **

She couldn’t deny the dress she had ended up wearing was beautiful. It was a sleeveless pale mint gown that flowed all the way to the floor. The round neckline was relaxed to the point of fanning out and flowing black material had been sewn here and there. With the help of Mrs. Fitz the dress had been cinched in at the waist and hemmed at the bottom to the point where it was like it had been made for her all along. Paired with a pair of heirloom earrings leant to her by Mrs. Fitz and a layer of dark red lipstick she looked like she was ready to walk the red carpet rather than spend her night moving back and forth across a high school gymnasium floor. ****  
** **

Music started playing through the speakers set up around the room both startling her back into the present and reminding her that there were plenty to do before the students - and their chaperones - started arriving.

****

\-----

****

Looking out amongst the remaining students it was apparent the night was a success. She could see Robbie dancing with a beautiful young lady in a pink dress near the glittering tree and a group of girls she had come to know through rehearsals over in the corner laughing happily. The general vibe was joyous and nothing out of the ordinary had been required of any of the adults, only the need to herd a couple students back into the gymnasium now and then after being found adventuring down the hallways.   ****  
** **

She continued to look around hoping to find Jamie. They had seen each other briefly at the beginning of the evening and a couple of times since, but one or the other were constantly being pulled away with chaperone duties. She smiled to see him, head and shoulders above the rest, walking towards her. She used the time to admired the black suit he had worn for the occasion. Custom made, she was sure. ****  
** **

“They’ve been keeping us busy tonight, eh, Sassenach?” Jamie asked as he came to stand beside her.  ****  
** **

“They have. Either that or you’ve just been trying to avoid me,” Claire teased. ****  
** **

“Never,” Jamie assured her. “And I dinna care what ‘emergencies’ there are from now on… I dinna plan to leave your side the rest of the evening. Especially since I’ve barely seen ye or been able to talk to ye the past couple of weeks.”  ****  
** **

It was true, they had hardly been able to spend any quality time together recently. Mrs. Fitz was working everyone to the bone at rehearsals leaving them little time to say anything more than ‘Hello’ to one another and with the busy season starting at Lallybroch Farms, they hadn’t had the chance to go out on any more dates. Whilst that didn’t concern her, she  _ was _ bothered by the way they had left things that night he escorted her home after Angus and Rupert’s bar fight. She had gone to bed only to lay there for hours thinking of so many different scenarios that ended in anything but “ _ Goodnight, Jamie. _ ” ****  
** **

“I told ye earlier, I ken... but my God, ye do look stunning tonight. When I first laid eyes on ye, ye just about took my breath away, Claire.” ****  
** **

“Thank you, Jamie.” Claire had felt her pulse jump at the sound of him using her birth name - something he usually didn’t do, and tried to hide the blush travelling up her neck to her cheeks.  “And thank you for the corsage. Even though I did get some strange looks with me being a chaperone, and not a student.”  ****  
** **

“Och, dinna mind the strange looks. I’m glad ye liked it.” ****  
** **

“You look very handsome tonight, also. I never imagined I would get the chance to see you dressed up in suit and tie but I must admit I’m very glad I have.” ****  
** **

“Oh, aye, it’s a verra rare occasion to be sure. Although I had to get rid of that tie… I felt as if I had a noose around my neck,” Jamie said laughing and held his hand out towards her as the songs changed over. “I believe it’s time I asked ye for a dance, Miss Beauchamp.” 

Claire glanced around, before taking Jamie's hand. She could see Mrs. Fitz dancing with fellow teacher Rufus Coulter and figured it would be perfectly alright to join in on the fun before the DJ packed up his equipment and left for the night. ****  
** **

__ Take my hand, I'll take the lead  
__ And every turn will be safe with me  
_ Don't be afraid, afraid to fall  
Y _ __ ou know I'll catch you through it all

Jamie led them onto the dance floor and twirled her so they were facing each other. He placed his other hand on her waist and began to lead.

__ And you can't keep us apart  
__ (Even a thousand miles can't keep us apart)  
' __ Cause my heart is wherever you are ****  
** **

Jamie looked down at her and smiled. Considering his size, Claire hadn't expected him to be such a graceful dancer. Although thinking back to watching him on the rugby field, she thought perhaps shouldn't be surprised at all.

__ It's like catching lightning, the chances of finding  
__ Someone like you  
__ It's one in a million, the chances of feeling  
__ The way we do ****  
** **

__ And with every step together  
__ We just keep on getting better  
__ So can I have this dance?  
__ (Can I have this dance?)  
__ Can I have this dance? ****  
** **

She could sense him humming as they danced.  ****  
** **

“Is this song a favourite of yours?” she asked him curiously.  ****  
** **

“Oh, aye,” Jamie nodded. “I ken all the words too if ye wish to hear me sing them.” ****  
** **

“Uhhhhhh….” Claire looked at him worriedly and he laughed.

_Oh, no mountain's too high and no ocean's too wide  
_ _'Cause together or not, our dance won't stop  
_ _Let it rain, let it pour, what we have is worth fighting for  
_ Y __ou know I believe that we were meant to be! Oh!  


__ It's like catching lightning, the chances of finding  
__ Someone like you  
_ It's one in a million, the chances of feeling  
_ __ The way we do

As the music slowed so did their footsteps. Claire wound her hand through Jamie’s curls and down around his ear. It was like nothing else existed but the two of them, so close she could almost feel his nose against hers.

__ And with every step together  
__ We just keep on getting better  
__ So can I have this dance?  
__ (Can I have this dance?)  
__ Can I have this dance?  
_ Can I have this dance?  
_ __ Can I have this dance?

Jamie leaned even closer and she turned her head to the side ever so slightly.

“We shouldn’t,” she breathed.

“Why?”

“Because we’re not alone,” she dropped her forehead onto his shoulder and laughed before tilting her face up towards him. “We are surrounded by dozens of teenagers who will most likely be following our lead if they haven’t already.”

“Oh, aye,” Jamie chuckled. “I forgot we’re supposed to be responsible adults for a couple of hours tonight. I completely lost my mind having ye so close to me.”

Claire took a deep breath and summoned the strength to pull out and away of Jamie’s embrace.

“I’m going to freshen up in the powder room”. 

Jamie caught her hand and pulled her back into his arms. “Am I ever going to get the chance to kiss ye properly?”

“I sure hope so,” Claire whispered.

Walking away, she looked over her shoulder she caught his eye for a moment. Yes, she  _ definitely _ needed to walk away and clear her head before she lost any and all control she still possessed.

 

\-----

****

It wasn’t until she was already halfway down the hall towards the staff restroom that she realised she could hear the muffled sound of people talking. Expecting to see more students out of bounds she was surprised to turn the corner to find Laoghaire and fellow teacher Meagan casually leaning against the wall opposite the bathroom chatting. ****  
** **

“Good night?” Claire asked as she approached them, wanting to seem friendly but not intrude on their conversation. She had been spending a lot of time with Laoghaire preparing for the school musical but she hardly knew Meagan other than she taught Social Science. ****  
** **

“Aye, who would have thought spending an evening with dozens of teenagers would be this fun?” Laoghaire replied with a smile. “Not I, that’s fer sure.” ****  
** **

“Och, that’s due to there being more than just teenagers here,” Meagan nudged Laoghaire with her elbow and laughed. “A handsome Scot can make even spending a Friday night at work worthwhile, aye?” ****  
** **

Claire made her way into the restroom, leaving the women to their conversation.  ****  
** **

“You should have seen him on the weekend,” Laoghaire giggled. “We were riding across Lallybroch and his hair was getting all mussed about in the wind. He looked even better than he does tonight, I promise ye.” ****  
** **

Claire paused inside the door as she tried her best to make out what Laoghaire was saying. She definitely heard the name Lallybroch.  _ Who _ exactly she was talking about she wasn’t sure. ****  
** **

“Then afterwards we had dinner in the manor house and I have to say Jamie looks even better in mood lighting, ken?’  ****  
** **

“Argh, you lucky thing! I want a red-haired Scot of my own to wine and dine me! It’s no’ fair!” ****  
** **

“Come on, let’s go back to the dance. With any luck John will turn up too and we can all go out for drinks after.” 

Claire pulled her phone out of her purse and brought up the string of recent text messages from Jamie. Scrolling through them there, just as she remembered, was a text telling her that he was “ _ busy at the Farm but can’t wait until the season is over to spend some time with you _ ”. Why would Jamie have told her he was too busy working to spend time with her when it was obvious he had plenty of time to entertain guests at the homestead? She took a deep breath to calm the doubt and panic she felt building within her. ****  
** **

“I’ll just ask him,” Claire told herself as she checked her clothing in the mirror and smoothed down her hair as best she could before slowly making her way back to the gymnasium. She never was one to rely on gossip or mess about and this would be the easiest way to uncover the truth.

“Miss Beauchamp!” Claire turned to find Annie, a member of the Science Team, jogging towards her. “Mr. Morrison said to ask if ye had yer wee medical kit with ye? A student has hurt himself.”

“Yes, of course. Come with me.”

After retrieving her kit, she followed Annie to the far side of the bleachers where Mr. Morrison stood next to a blonde-haired boy who sat clutching his leg. Seeing the blood seeping from his shin, she quickly knelt down in front of him and opened her kit.

“Hello, I’m Miss Beauchamp,” Claire introduced herself as the boy rolled up his pant leg a little further. “I don’t believe we've met before?”

“Hamish,” responded the boy through gritted teeth.

“How exactly did you manage to do this, Hamish?” She asked in an attempt to distract him while she cleaned the cut.

“Apparently, Hamish was dared to demonstrate his parkour skills,” Mr. Morrison explained with a stern tone when Hamish remained silent and, she suspected, a little embarrassed.

“Ah,” Claire nodded as she bandaged his leg. “Well, the good news is that it looks worse than it really is. Try to keep it dry over the weekend and I can take another look at it on Monday when you have a free period to make sure it’s healing okay. Just please try to refrain from jumping off anything in the meantime?”

“Yes, Miss Beauchamp,” Hamish said meekly. “Thank ye.”

Claire packed up her kit and made a mental note to replace the items she had used first thing Monday morning. While she could easily complete the task now but she was much more interested in returning to the dance. Initially she had been looking forward to returning to Jamie’s arms - with a very respectable distance between their bodies, of course - but now she was more interested in talking.  ****  
** **

Being so close to the end of the evening the crowd on the dance floor had thinned out and it was apparent Jamie wasn’t anywhere to be found. Claire continued walking through to the back of the gymnasium and out the doors to the courtyard below. She had hoped to find Jamie out here where teachers often gathered for a quiet moment of privacy away from the student body. What she never expected to find was him against the brick wall kissing Laoghaire.  ****  
** **

For what felt like an eternity Claire just stood there unblinking. Jamie looked up and surprise washed over his face at the sight of her standing there. People always said she had a glass face, one that reflected all her thoughts and feelings, and she wondered if he could see just what she was going through her mind right then. How much her heart was hurting in her chest. How fast her thoughts were racing. Her eyes started to blur and not willing to stay even one second longer she turned and all but ran back inside. ****  
** **

“Claire!” At the sound of her name she paused in the doorway and looked back. It was funny how something that had provided her with so much pleasure now only caused her more pain. ****  
** **

“No, Jamie,” she shook her head and turned away from him for the last time. ****  
** **

She brushed the tears from her eyes and schooled her face as she grabbed her purse and looked about the gymnasium for Mr. Morrison. She’d had plenty of practice as a medical professional keeping herself cool and calm but it had been a while since she had to implement it in her personal life. ****  
** **

“Mr. Morrison,” she said as she came upon the man. “I’m so very sorry but I need to head out a little early. I did promise to help for the entire evening, I know. I hope you don’t mind?” ****  
** **

“Nay worries at all, my dear,” the man smiled as he looked out the students. “It’s very quiet and it’s almost time for everyone to head home anyway. I’ll see you on Monday.” ****  
** **

Claire smiled thankfully and rushed out to where she had parked her car at the beginning of the evening. The wind blew her hair out of its hold and around her face as she pulled open the car door and slumped onto the driver’s seat. She dumped her purse onto the seat beside her and blew the hair out of her eyes as she fumbled putting the key into the ignition.  ****  
** **

Truthfully she didn’t even remember the drive home. Normally she would have been concerned by her dangerous behaviour but her mind couldn’t take on any more than it already had tonight. Almost robotically she made her way into the bathroom. She avoided the mirror as she washed the make-up off her face and pulled the pins out of her hair. She then shed her dress and moved into the bedroom to pull on her comfiest oversized tee shirt and climbed into bed. 

As she lay there in silence the words spoken by Angus and Rupert at the pub the other night ran through her head.  “ _...we’ve met many o’ Jamie’s lasses, but never twice if ye ken my meaning? _ ” and “ _ a reputation fer wooing the ladies but never for keeping them _ ” were what they had told her. At the time she had thought that meant she was special, that she was different. Now, …now she realised they were actually a warning about the man she was getting close to. 

She picked up her phone and once again scrolled through the text messages she had received from him over the last couple of weeks. Busy working he had made her believe.  _ Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ. _ That was exactly what Frank used to say and she knew now for certain he wasn’t working long evenings like he always claimed. Just like tonight she had seen it with her very own eyes. 

Suddenly her phone lit up and Jamie’s face appeared on the screen. She let it vibrate in her hand for a moment before pressing “decline”.

“I’m not doing this again,” she said out loud into the dark of night, her words both strong and clear. “ _ I won’t. _ ”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find Can I Have This Dance from High School Musical 3 on YouTube


	9. Gotta Go My Own Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire struggles in the aftermath of the school dance and makes a decision about her future.

She felt her phone vibrate inside her handbag and sighed. Jamie was persistent, she had to give him that. He had called, left several text messages and even filled her voicemail to the point her own phone was frequently reminding her to listen to them. She had also heard from several people, Mrs. Fitz included, that he had been asking about her to which she would smile and politely thank the messenger.

How she was going to get through yet another rehearsal with him in the same room as her, she didn’t know. Performance days were drawing closer and rehearsals were becoming all the more frequent. She really couldn’t afford to miss any, especially not for a matter so personal (and completely unrelated to her ability to attend). So far she had managed to avoid talking to him, simply giving a polite nod or excusing herself quickly if he entered the same room or space as her. Luckily Laoghaire spent most of her time backstage or elsewhere such as the sewing room, making last minute alterations. She wasn’t sure she could handle avoiding more than one person at a time. It was all becoming increasingly difficult, constantly on the lookout, always aware of where Jamie was and what he was doing. 

It would be so much easier to simply pack up and leave. When she took her sabbatical and booked a flight to Scotland she had never intended on staying. Visit some people from her past such as Mrs. Graham and take her time driving through the Highlands to visit all the popular tourist attractions was all she had planned. Yet here she was, working at her old high school and avoiding people. She may as well be at home in Boston, for all the difference it made. But she had made a commitment to both the school and the students here and no matter the circumstances she would never walk out - no matter how much she wanted to. 

Most of the time she just felt numb. Other times incredibly stupid for believing in someone, trusting someone, again. She had shared more with Jamie than she ever had with anyone because it  _ felt _ different… because it  _ was _ different. Or so she had thought. She opened up her heart and slowly let her walls come down… and for what? She’d had worse weeks, she reminded herself. Still, this one definitely made the top five. 

She took her time walking down the hallway towards the auditorium. One rehearsal at a time. That's all she had to focus on.

Opening night was drawing closer and with that came a flurry of to do lists to get things ready and increasing excitement and nervousness amongst the cast, crew, and directors. Each rehearsal showed that the most nervous one, however, was Mrs. Fitz, and this one was proving no different.

“Claire,” Mrs. Fitz interrupted her thoughts, “would you be a dear and go down to the directors table and fetch me a new notepad? I'm very close to running out of pages in this one.”

“Of course, Mrs. Fitz,” Claire stood up an dusted off her knees. “I won't be a moment.”

Claire made her way down the stairs listening to the students rehearsing their lines all the while. The excitement was almost palpable and she found herself getting excited on their behalf. Suddenly another hand reached down and picked up the notepad. Surprised, she looked up to find Jamie, standing there, a hesitant but determined look on his face.

“Please, can we talk? Will ye let me explain?” He asked quietly, as he handed the notepad to her.

“I’ve already given you my answer, Jamie.”

“Aye, aye ye have,” he replied softly. “I was just hoping ye might have changed yer mind.”

Claire turned and began to walk away. 

“I’d do anything, ye know?” She paused in her footsteps but didn’t turn around. “If ye wanted to talk right now, right this very second, I would hand the keys of my truck over to Robbie so they could drive themselves home.”

“And what about you?” she asked out of plain curiosity, clutching the notepad to her chest. “How would you get home?”

“Catch a taxi? Hitchhike? Walk? It could be snowing for all I cared.”

Against her own will, a smile crept onto Claire’s face as she resumed walking away from him.

The rest of rehearsal didn't go as quick as she had hoped but it did go smoothly, something she had discovered since working with the drama team to be thankful for. Mrs. Fitz was extremely pleased with the students work and sent everyone home five minutes early. Claire took her time gathering her things, making sure to allow Jamie and the children enough time to leave before she followed everyone out the door. How long she could keep this up she really didn't know. 

Sitting in the car, she stared out into the darkness, the headlights of other cars leaving the parking lot shining in her peripheral vision. She took a deep breath and pulled her phone out of her bag and pulled up the string of recent text messages from Jamie.

_ Can we please just talk, Sassenach?  _ The most recent had read. Perhaps, she considered, it was time for her to explain. She ran one of her fingers back and forth across her bottom lip as she made the decision to reply.

_ Meet me at the stadium entrance tomorrow after school. 4:00. _

Not 30 seconds later her phone vibrated in her hand.

_ I will be there. Thank you, Sassenach.  _

 

\---------

 

Claire stood waiting at the stadium entrance, leaning back against the brick wall for both physical and emotional support. She still didn’t want to talk to Jamie and the thought of finally having to face him after what had happened at the dance made her stomach clench. But, she reminded herself, she owed it both to him and herself to explain why she had reacted the way she did and, most importantly, why she had taken a step back from Jamie. At least here, sitting on the otherwise empty bleachers they would be away from prying eyes and curious ears. At this point that's all she could ask for.

She watched as Jamie’s truck pulled into the parking lot and stopped two spaces down from where she had parked her own vehicle. She stared at the Lallybroch Farms logo on the door and couldn’t help but think of that Saturday they had worked together. How much about his past he had shared with her. It gave her the strength she was searching for to finally share some of her own with him. As scary as that may be.

The door on the opposite side slammed shut and she watched him walk around the vehicle to where she stood waiting.  _ Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, did he look good today. _ Suddenly she wished she were wearing sunglasses, something to provide her with some protection, some security, despite them not being needed in the current weather.  _ Stay strong, Beauchamp. Don’t let his charms and his good looks distract you _ . She told herself.

“Hi, Sass-”

“Don’t call me that,” Claire shot him a look, her defences restored. “Don’t  _ ever  _ call me that.”

“I’m sorry - Claire. How are ye?”

“How am I?” she laughed, nerves getting the better of her. “That’s the question you are starting with?  _ Really _ ?”

“Weel, I- it’s just… Christ, this is awkward,” Jamie raised his hand and combed his fingers through his hair nervously. “I dinna ken what to do or say. I’m so afraid of doing the wrong thing, to be verra honest with ye.” 

“Let’s go,” Claire said kindly, taking pity on the nervous man. She straightened up and nodded her head towards the entrance indicating for Jamie to follow her, leading the way into the stadium and up into the nearest set of bleachers bathed in soft sunlight. She took a seat in the very top row while Jamie chose one a few steps down from her. They sat in silence for a moment as Claire considered her words.

“I agreed to meet with you, but... I need you to let me talk and explain some things. Can you do that?”

“Yes, Claire, anything ye ask,” Jamie pulled his feet up and positioned himself sideways on the seat. “What is it ye need to tell me?

Settling into her own seat, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes, letting her memories take her back. It was a time she had tried so hard to forget, far too painful to bear remembering even now.  She remained silent for what felt like an eternity before she finally began to speak.

“I was engaged. To a man.”

“Ye were engaged?” Claire didn’t need to look at his face to know he was surprised, she could hear it in the inflection of his voice. “I didna ken that. I mean, I assumed you had been with someone - how could you not be? Yer-”

“His name was Frank...Frank Randall.” She interrupted his rambling. “We had been together so long it actually seemed odd to  _ not _ be engaged. It’s what people - our friends, our family, even our colleagues - expected. It was what Frank expected, to be sure. And even after everything that had happened…  _ before _ , I felt so excited to be engaged.

“He was a historian, both well established and well respected in his field. Had written several books on the history of the Scots, actually, many specifically about what happened at Culloden. He had power, position, and was a charming hit with everyone who met him - especially the female kind. He could’ve had anyone…  _ been  _ with anyone. But for some reason he chose me.”

“Claire-” 

“No,” Claire waved away whatever Jamie was going to say, “I don’t mean to say I didn’t have confidence in myself or my worth. It was just that I had moved around so much my whole life, had always been that awkward, shy girl whom no one ever noticed. Frank noticed me. I’d… I’d never experienced anything like it before. He didn’t dilly dally or dance around the subject. One day, he just came up to me after a dinner Uncle Lamb had with some colleagues of his, at which Frank was in attendance, and quite simply said ‘Hello, I’m Frank. I think you’re quite attractive and intelligent. Would you like to go on a dinner date with me?’ I can remember it word for word.” Claire chuckled.

“How romantic.” Jamie responded dryly. 

“I thought you said you were going to listen?” Claire looked down at him an eyebrow raised.

“I’m sorry, yes, you’re right,” Jamie said meekly. “So... he asked ye out?”

“Mmm,” Claire nodded. “We started dating right away, became what I would consider ‘exclusive’ after just the very first date.  He was intelligent, older. Unlike so many of the men my age, he was so mature. He wasn’t needy or clingy and he didn’t expect me to be those things, which was the best part of all. We just worked well together, it was… such a logical fit. I thought things were great.”

“Thought?”

“Teaching assistant,” she explained simply. “What I came to realise was she assisted with much more than just teaching duties.”

Claire looked at Jamie as he nodded slowly, looking out at the field. He understood what she meant.

“I forgave him, of course. He assured me it was a one-time thing and I was more than happy to believe it had been a slip-up, like he claimed - I loved him. He promised me it was a mistake and that nothing of the sort would ever happen again. After that he was what you might call a “model boyfriend” and I trusted he had told me the truth. He took me on trips up and down the East Coast - we turned every work event into a mini getaway. When he got down on one knee and proposed I was so happy I cried.” Claire smiled sadly at the memory. For all it was worth, it had been a good weekend.

“We were both busy with work, as always, but we made time to plan both the wedding and our future. Where we would live, when we wanted to have children, the guests we wanted to have in attendance for our big day, all of the usual things you talk about and plan for when you are going to spend the rest of your life with someone. Then, a few months after we got engaged, I had a work conference out of town but missed my flight. So, I booked one for the next day and went over to Frank’s to surprise him - thinking we could spend a few more hours together - when I walked in on him,” she laughed bitterly, “...on  _ them _ . Ridiculously enough, all I could focus on was the fact they were kissing on the couch, the one  _ I _ had picked out. It was as if I’d been punched in the stomach. Certainly not the fact that the woman was Janine, one of my really good friends from work."

“Claire…” Jamie said as he reached for her hand and Claire folded her arms across her chest and continued her story.

“As strange as it sounds it wasn’t the affair that bothered me so much - although perhaps it should have - it was that he had lied to my face. Again and  _ again _ . Christ, I had already forgiven him once. I suppose he figured I would forgive him again.” Claire scoffed. “No, not this time. I had trusted him - with both my heart and my livelihood and he had used it against me. The engagement was off - that decision came easy enough. It’s what to do next that I struggled with. I could hardly return to work and face my colleagues, not only the one Frank had been having an affair with but all the others who surely knew by then what had happened - if they didn’t already, that is.

“So, I decided to put in an application for a 12 month sabbatical and was so relieved when it was approved. Luckily, we hadn’t officially moved in together by that point and most of my things were still at my apartment. I stayed there while my best friend, Joe, went and picked up the few things still at Frank’s and brought them back to my place while I considered what I would do with the 12 months ahead of where. My savings combined with the money I had inherited after Uncle Lamb’s death meant I wouldn’t have to work at all if I didn’t want to. Of everything, I was certain I couldn't stay in Boston, no matter what I decided to do. 

“One night, as I was sitting on the couch not really watching the movie on the television, I reflecting on all that my life had become and where I had last been happiest. And I remembered Scotland. With my parents, before they were taken from me. So that is what led me here. At first I thought it had led me here - to you. But I realise now that was just a fantasy - something to take my mind of what had happened back in Boston. I need to refocus on healing, on finding myself, not get distracted by anything remotely romantic. I can’t go through what I went through with Frank again. I  _ won’t _ .”

“But what about us?” Jamie asked quietly and she could tell he already knew her answer. “What about everything we’ve been through?”

“It won’t change anything, Jamie,” she shook her head. “Whatever it is that happened, I think we would still end up here - my decision would remain the same. I just.. wanted you to understand why I acted how I did when I saw you with Laoghaire and why I’ve decided I need to be alone, to go my own way. I have to do what is best for me.” 

They sat in silence for a time, a gentle breeze rustling the leaves scattered by her feet. She had come to the stadium prepared to fight and instead it was almost like she was being provided the space and solitude she had craved for so long - time to simply let her thoughts run through her mind as she pleased without the pressure of expectations or demands put in place by someone else.

“I’m surprised, you know?”

“Aye?”

“Mmmm…” Claire paused and turned her entire body to face him. “I truly expected you to do most of the talking today.”

“Why would ye expect that?” Jamie raised his brows quizzically. “I agreed to yer conditions, did I no’?"

“Because that’s what Frank would have done,” she stated simply. “But... you’re not Frank are you?”

“No, Claire,” he shook his head slightly, his eyes unblinking as he looked directly into hers. “I’m not.”


	10. Get'cha Head In The Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The school rugby finals are coming up and rehearsals for the school musical are getting even more intense as opening night looms.

Walking down the halls of North High School, Claire found herself practically enveloped in excited energy. North High’s rugby team had won the recent quarter-final game, and it seemed there wasn’t a single person failing to gear up for the semi final that was drawing closer. Dozens of posters had been plastered on walls and paw prints adorned every available surface including the students themselves. Claire stopped in front of the school noticeboard to read the most recent additions.

“All you alright, dear? Ye look a wee bit confused.”

Claire turned to look at Mrs. Fitz who had joined her and smiled.

“A little, yes,” she nodded pointing to the GO WILDCATS sign that had been placed at the very top of the board. “I was under the impression that the school mascot was the Highland Tiger? At least it was when I was a student here. Has it changed?”

“Naye, lass,” Mrs. Fitz chuckled. “The Highland Tiger is also the name for the Scottish Wildcat, ken? Have you ever seen one - in real life?

Claire shook her head. If she had seen a tiger in the Scottish Highlands surely she would have noticed.

“They’re not like real tigers at all,” explained Mrs. Fitz as if reading her thoughts, “only twice the size of a domestic cat. But, it does make for quite a fierce mascot, does it no’?

“It does,” Claire agreed. “I think I like it even more now that I know the story behind it.”

“Come along, then,” Mrs. Fitz patted her arm and guided her down the hallway. “There’s so much still to be done - we mustn’t waste a single minute!”

Opening night was looming above their heads and Mrs. Fitz had someone how managed to become even more intense than she was the week prior. Claire was thankful to be so busy, and at this point would have let the woman guide her anywhere so long as in the end there was something for her to do. 

Saying goodbye to Jamie after the time they spent sitting in the stadium bleachers last week had been awkward to say the least. She could tell from the way Jamie was standing by his truck that he didn’t want leave and most certainly wanted to say something. But he had been true to his word and simply listened to her story. She had been so certain that was what she had wanted. But she had hardly slept since that day, lying in bed until the early hours of the morning wondering if that had been the right decision. She had needed to protect herself, that she didn’t regret. She would never apologise for putting herself first. But now she couldn’t help but wonder what it is Jamie would have told her if given the chance. 

Walking into the auditorium, she slowed down to let Mrs. Fitz go ahead as she looked for Jamie amongst the students. Not finding a single sign of his attendance, she moved on and got herself set up for the rehearsal. As she watched the students on stage she felt immensely proud of being part of the production - however minor her role might actually be. Everyone had been putting in so much hard work that it was turning out to be better than she had ever expected. Something Mrs. Fitz apparently did not agree on.

“Stop. Stop!” she called out with one hand in the air. “Everybody just stop. You are letting your nerves get to you and it is coming through in your performance! We’ll take a small break - I want everyone to really think about what it means to become your characters, to  _ embody _ them! Please be back in your places in five minutes!”

Claire stood up from her seat and stretched her shoulders.

“Miss Beauchamp!” Ellie called excitedly as she rushed towards the director’s table. “What do ye think of the musical so far? Do ye love it?”

“It’s absolutely fantastic, Ellie! Are you excited for the show to finally begin?”

“Aye! Even though I’ll only be onstage on the weekend I’m so excited! Mam and Da said they’re going to wait until then to see the musical. I canna wait!”

“Speaking of your family, ah, where’s your Uncle Jamie? I haven’t seen him all night.”

“Oh,” Ellie grimaced, “he’s at home at Lallybroch healing. Robbie drove us here instead.”

“Healing?” She asked, “Healing from what?”

“Weel, I dinna ken exactly but I overheard Uncle Jamie telling Mam that there was an ‘incident’ with one of the horses but tis ‘barely a scratch’,” Ellie emphasized with air quotes. “I wouldna worry too much, though. Uncle Jamie’s been through much worse and I’m sure he’ll be fine before the weekend’s over.”

Claire watched Ellie run off in typical fashion without so much as a goodbye.  _ You would think I would be used to it by now _ , she shook her head, smiling. 

 

\-----

 

Thoughts of Jamie’s injury, including what happened and how bad it was, plagued her all evening. In the dark of night, her mind conjured all sorts of scenarios that resulted in Jamie debilitated and unable to reach help from his residence in the Highlands. 

She woke up early Saturday morning determined to drive out to Lallybroch to see for herself the state Jamie was in.  _ It’s my duty as a doctor and part of the oath I took _ , Claire told herself. 

The confidence she had felt at the beginning of her drive began to wane as Lallybroch’s stone archway came into view.  _ Too late now,  _ she thought as she found herself at Jamie’s doorstep. She raised her hand and knocked soundly on the front door. It wasn’t long before the door opened and there stood Jamie dressed in white t-shirt and black sweatpants, his tartan blanket wrapped around his shoulders and a grimace on his face.

“Hello, Jamie,” she began, finding herself unsure what to say now that she stood face to face with him. Everything she had thought of in the car on the drive up now sounded like nonsense, even to herself. “I, ah… you weren’t at rehearsal last night. Ellie told me that you’d been hurt and I just wanted to come and see if you were okay. But, I see now that I needn’t have come, of course you can take care of yourself. I’m so sorry, I’ll be on my way.” 

She turned away from the door feeling incredibly foolish.  _ What in heaven's name had she been thinking? _

“Wait.”

She turned and looked back at Jamie waiting for him to continue.

“I’m glad yer here, not for the doctoring sae much,” he smirked, “but for the company. It must have been a long drive and the least I can do is offer you some tea?”

Claire nodded her head and followed him inside and all the way down to the kitchen. She sat down on the bar stool and placed her tote bag at her feet. She watched Jamie put the kettle on the stove and pull mugs out of the cupboard above his head. 

“What happened?” she asked plainly. 

“Hmm?” Jamie hummed without turning around. He moved gingerly and struggled pulling open the heavy fridge door for a bottle of milk.

“It’s clear you’re having a bit of trouble moving around and lifting things.”

“Och, no. Just slow moving this early in the morning. Dinna fash, Claire, ‘tis naught but a scratch.” He picked up both mugs and nodded his head towards the living room. “Let’s go sit down where it’s a little more comfortable.”

Claire took a seat on the sofa and reached out to take her mug as Jamie handed it to her. 

“Thank you.” 

“You are most welcome, lass,” Jamie said taking a seat on the chair opposite the sofa. “So, how did rehearsal go last night? I hate to have missed it with opening night sae close. I’ll be lucky if the bairns forgive me come the next one.” 

“Really well. Mrs. Fitz’s opinions might differ,” she chuckled to herself, “but I can confidently say they’re very close to being ready for opening night.”

“I didn’t doubt it for a moment,” Jamie turned to place his mug on the side table and she saw pain flash across his face and his breath catch in his chest as he moved.  _ Just ‘a scratch’ my arse _ , she thought and placed her own mug down.

“Take your shirt off.”

“Excuse me?” 

“I said, take your shirt off. Come on, up!” She stood and grabbed a hold of his upper arm to guide him upright. “I don’t trust you to diagnose yourself so I’m just going to have to do it for you.”

For once Jamie heeded her words and allowed her to help him undress.

“Now let me see,” she moved him gently.

“What is that? You look like you got  _ stepped on _ by a horse.”

“Mmm, ‘cause I was.”

“Jamie!” she practically shrieked. “Go and lay on the sofa. Now.”

“Please, Claire. I thought ye were a doctor? Surely ye can see fer yerself it’s naught but a scratch,” he said grumpily as he followed her instructions.

“Do you really not have any idea what damage a horse can inflict on your internal organs? Honestly, Jamie. I thought you were a skilled professional and I have to tell you I am seriously doubting _ your  _ claims.” She continued to berate him as she palpated around the sight of the horseshoe shaped bruise. "How exactly did this happen?"   
  
"Laoghaire." He stated simply and Claire stilled. Perhaps she should just leave him here alone, internal bleeding be damned. "It’s no’ what yer thinking. Can ye just let me explain?  _ Please _ ?" 

Claire studied him for a moment, taking in his wide eyes and the pleading look on his face. She stepped back and sat down on the armchair across from him.   
  
"Alright." She gave him a solitary nod and waited. It wasn’t a life or death situation - his injuries could wait a little longer.

Jamie took his time getting comfortable on the couch, adjusting the pillow behind his head. With a deep breath he started.

“It’s true what I told ye, ye know? It has truly been a busy time here on the Farm and I haven’t had the time for any kind of a social life. Laoghaire’s father is one of our most important clients. He put in a request for us to organise a new horse for Laoghaire. Normally this type of work is rather straightforward, pretty much solitary in nature. But Laoghaire, in typical fashion,” he rolled his eyes, “took it upon herself to oversee the purchase and training of her new gelding. Annoying as it may have been, she wasn’t in the way and I was hardly in the position to turn a client - or their daughter - away.”

“She said she had spent time with you, here, outside of work hours.” Claire mentioned, far more interested in what happened after work hours.

“Aye, that much is true. One time she did stay for dinner at the manor house but we didna dine alone. Murtagh, Fergus and Mrs. Crook all sat with us at the dining table - there was absolutely nothing romantic about it, I promise ye. Mrs. Crook had extended the invitation for her to eat with us. If I invited someone for dinner I sure as hell wouldn’t have Murtagh at the table with us, let me tell ye!” Jamie snorted at his own joke and winced, placing the palm of his hand against his rib cage. 

_ Serves him right f or telling such an awful joke _ , Claire figured.

“I dated Laoghaire once. Did ye ken that?” Jamie glanced at Claire to see her reaction. “Well, I’m not sure ye could really call it ‘dating’. In senior year, we went out on a couple of dates, which ended in a few kisses, if I’m being completely honest. It was just a bit of teenage fun. I couldn’t ever see us being anything beyond acquaintances, certainly not in a serious relationship, so I ended… whatever it had been with her. I would never date her now, not even as adults. This,” he gestured towards his chest,” is just one of the many reasons why. She’s a ridiculous and foolish lass.”

“You still haven't told me how that happened.” she pointed out. 

“I was out working with one of the mares when Laoghaire spooked the girl. I didna even ken she was on the Farm let alone coming up to the fence line. The horse reared up suddenly and I tripped over my own damn feet and found myself on the underside of a shoe. Not a place I wanna be again anytime soon let me assure ye.”

“Well, that explains the lack of  _ external _ trauma to your upper torso but what about the school dance? I saw you two kissing with my own eyes. You can’t possibly deny that happened.”

“Aye,” he sighed, “that  _ did _ happen. But I promise ye now it’s not what ye must be thinking. We - you and I - were dancing together and by the time ye left to go to the ‘powder room’, as ye called it, I was feeling a bit... weel, I needed some cold fresh air if ye ken what I mean.”

Claire blushed and tried to stifle the laugh building up in her throat. “I do ken,” she said seriously, trying to compose herself.

“I intended to send ye a text to let ye know just in case ye were wondering where I was when ye got back but Laoghaire joined me and started asking questions about her horse. We'd only been talking a few minutes when she started coming on a bit strong and I tried to let her down as gently as I could but I think she musta misunderstood - the next thing I knew she threw her arms around me and started kissing me. It all happened in a split second and suddenly you were standing there and, Christ, I wanted to run after ye - to stop ye from leaving - but I kent ye were upset and Laoghaire was still hanging to my arm and I couldn’t get her to leave. I was just so confused how it had all gone from such a wonderful date to a complete disaster when-”

“Date?” Claire interrupted.

“Aye, a date.”

“We weren’t on a date.”

“What do ye mean we weren’t? Of course we were!”

“We were chaperoning the high school dance, Jamie. More importantly, you never asked me to be your date!”

“I got ye a corsage, didna I?”

“What has that got to do with anything??”

“Weel, I didna think it was necessary to ask ye on a date if we were already dating.”

“What in heaven's name are you talking about, Jamie? What ever gave you the impression that we were dating - exclusively at that? We never  _ once  _ discussed such a thing.”

Jamie opened and closed his mouth apparently only now realising the truth in Claire’s words.

“Jamie…” she started slowly, “have you ever been in a serious committed relationship with anyone before?”

Jamie blushed and looked down at his hands. “Is it that obvious?”

“Right now, I would say so,” laughter building up in her chest.

“I’ve been on dates with many a lass, if ye really want to know-”

“Yes, I’ve heard,” she interrupted dryly thinking back to what both Rupert and Angus had told her that night at The High Hill.

“- but, no, I’ve never been serious about anyone before you. Ye remember my sister Jenny and her husband Ian? I remember them falling in love. I think everyone remembers them falling love, aye? By their second date Jenny had announced to Ian that they were dating and here they are married with a house overrun with weans. I... kind of just assumed that’s how committed relationships worked,” he caught sight of the smile Claire was trying so desperately to hide and grinned at her. “No?”

“No!” She laughed out loud. 

“Well then, there’s a lot I am yet tae learn, aye?” His face became serious all of a sudden. “Including how to treat and communicate with the woman I care for. I should have told Laoghaire ‘no’ in the most plain of terms and I should have made sure she understood - from the very beginning. I am so sorry, Claire, truly. I never meant to hurt you.”

Claire leaned back in the armchair and considered him. Just as he did at the stadium he didn’t rush her or demand a response but waited until she was ready.

“I believe you Jamie. But after everything I’ve been through in the past, I'm…  _ afraid _ to trust you.” she shook her head. “I know that’s not what you want to hear but it’s the truth.”

“I understand,” Jamie nodded. “What about in the future? Do ye think ye might let me prove ye can trust me - in the future?”

“I’m scared,” she admitted, “but with time… I think I might. I want to. And now that you know about me - about my past - are you sure you want to? Prove it to me, I mean.” 

“Neither of us are the teenagers we once were, aye? But I am willing to commit to making this right, Claire, because what it is between us it’s special, I ken that too. The question is will you risk the man I am for the sake of the one ye once knew?”

“Yes, Jamie, I will. I would very much like to get to know the man you are now and slowly work towards getting back to where we once were,” Claire stood and gathered their now cold cups of tea much to Jamie’s bewilderment. “But first, let’s take you to the hospital for a thorough examination, just in case? I’m afraid I only spend time with people suffering from internal injuries during working hours not in my spare time.”

Seeing her joke for what it was he grinned. 

“Aye, Sassenach,” he said with a question in his voice. She nodded, smiling and letting him know that his nickname for her was okay. A grin broke out on Jamie’s face. “Let’s go.”


	11. I Want It All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire and Jamie help the North High rugby team host a bake sale to raise funds for a new project and attend the cast party to celebrate opening night of the high school musical.

Claire felt like she was in one of those musicals. One where the characters suddenly burst into song and express their innermost thoughts. She wasn’t in a musical, of course, and she certainly wasn’t about to burst into song in the middle of the kitchen but… she was so happy she felt as if she could.

It had been two weeks since she and Jamie had shared their truths with one another and committed to starting anew - this time with nothing held back between them. They were taking things slowly, something Claire was more than fine with. Her days went by as usual, occupied by her duties at North High but she had begun to look forward to her evenings when she would often spend time talking to Jamie.

Today, however, she taken the afternoon off work and popped into her now favourite grocery store IGS to purchase supplies she needed for the raspberry buns, a recipe Mrs. Graham had shared with her when she called her in a panic after volunteering to help with the school bake sale. Knowing what to bake and actually doing it were two very different things, however, and she was lucky it hadn’t been hard to convince Jamie it would be logical for the two of them to bake together before the opening performance of the high school musical later that night.

“Does the rugby team host a bake sale every year?” Claire asked as she sifted flour into a bowl.

“Naye,” responded Jamie as greased the baking sheets. “This is actually the first time they have hosted such an event. Normally the Friday before the big game would be a big celebration -  something similar to a ‘Pep Rally’, as they call it in the States.”

“Oh, yes,” Claire nodded, remembering the pep rallies she had attended in her youth. “So what made them decide to do this instead?”

“Robbie tells me that the boys were inspired by the stadium that hosted their recent semi-final. Quite state of the art, I am to understand. They decided amongst themselves that a fundraiser would be a better use of their time and effort, that the money could go towards updating North High’s rugby stadium facilities to cater for an even wider audience - installing new access ramps and the like, ken?”

“That’s a wonderful idea! I haven’t known them long, but I have to say I’m quite proud of them for wanting to contribute and build something like this. Your nephew is following in your footsteps it would seem, thinking of others and willing to lend a helping hand. Let’s just hope those are the only traits he picks up, hmm? And not the… what was it you said? Dating _'many a lassies_ ’?” Claire teased him with a smirk on her face.

Jamie blushed slightly but otherwise didn’t react. “A wee bit jealous, are ye now?”

“Maybe,” Claire said nonchalantly, pretending to concentrate on the jam boiling on the stove. “Or maybe I’m just curious as to how many ‘lasses’ we are talking about. Rupert gave the impression it was quite a lot.”

“First off,” Jamie reached out and grabbed her hand, obviously not at all fooled by her performance, “Rupert is a dolt, this ye ken. He and Angus like to think the more women ye’ve dated the more of a man ye are. They’re two of my oldest friends, but they can never quite leave our high school and college days behind us, aye?”

Claire nodded and Jamie let go of her hand.

“All through college and then when I started my professional career I dated, casually. I never wanted to get into a serious relationship with anyone mainly because I couldn’t lose focus - not on my studies, not on the game. I couldn’t afford to. And if I’m being honest…” Jamie wiped his hands on a towel and flung it over his shoulder. “I didn’t _want_ to be in a serious relationship with anyone. I had just never felt that… connection. It wasna the same as it is with you. Does that make sense?”

“I feel the same way,” Claire nodded. “With Frank - and the few others I’d dated before him - it was just… well it wasn’t _this._ And while I _was_ curious, I want you to know that what happened in the past, it’s in the past. Whether you dated 2 or 20 women, it makes no difference to me. What we are, what we have, right now, is the only thing that matters to me.”

“And to me, Sassenach.” Jamie wound his arm around her waist and pulled her against him.

Suddenly, the fire alarm started ringing loudly as smoke began filling the room. Claire pulled away from Jamie and looked for the culprit: a pot full of burned jam on the stove burner they had left unattended during their conversation. Coughing and waving to try and dissipate the smoke around them, she ran to the kitchen window and raised it quickly as Jamie went over and pulled the pot of jam from the stove.

“Weel Sassenach, one thing today has taught me… ye’d best leave the cooking to me, aye?”

 

\-----

 

“Ye’ve still got a bit of flour on yer face, Sassenach,” Jamie reached out and smoothed his thumb along her jawline. 

“Has it been there all night?” she rubbed the palm of her hand furiously against the spot Jamie had touched “During the entire show? Why didn’t you tell me??” 

“Nay, Sassenach,” Jamie laughed as he pulled her hand away from her face and linked their fingers tightly rather than letting go. “I just wanted an excuse to touch yer bonnie face.”

“You’re going to cause a scandal, Jamie!” Claire gently slapped him on the bicep with her free hand and laughed. “This is a party to celebrate the students - remember that!”

The room was filled with dozens of parents and other various family members all surrounding members of the cast and crew. Claire could only imagine how proud they all were. Opening night of the High School Musical had been a success. Only one small flaw had occurred but it was so minor and the students had dealt with it so quickly she doubted anyone in the audience even noticed. Mrs. Fitz was busy bustling around the room somehow managing to speak with everyone and no one all at the same time. 

“Claire! Jamie!” Mrs. Fitz called as she hurried towards them, reaching out to grasp Claire’s hand. “Wasn’t the show just fabulous? I’m so, so proud of everyone!”

“Aye-” Jamie’s voice died as they watched the woman keep walking past them, her eyes now set on something (or someone) else.

“You can’t deny she’s the life of the party,” Claire chuckled.

“Verra true,” said Jamie shaking his head. “Come on, let’s go talk to some people who actually want to have a conversation, aye?”

She followed Jamie across the room to where a group of people, including Jenny and Ian, stood talking by the array of various food and drinks.

“Jamie,” Jenny smiled, “I was just tellin’ Uncle Collum here about what ye have planned fer this summer on the Farm.”

“It’s good to see ye, Uncle." Jamie reached out and shook the man’s hand. "We have quite a bit of work ahead, but it’s exciting to think we will have a busy summer of work. May I introduce to Claire Beauchamp? Claire this is Collum MacKenzie and his wife Letitia.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet ye, Mistress Beauchamp,” Collum nodded towards her.

“You too, Mr. Mackenzie,” Claire replied with a smile and turned to his wife, “Mrs. Mackenzie.”

“Och, please do call me Letitia,” the woman smiled kindly, “do ye have children of yer own in the musical?”

“No, no, I’ve just been assisting Mrs. Fitz. What about yourselves? What brought you here tonight? Did you enjoy it?”

“Oh, it was lovely! It’s always delightful to watch kin performing on stage, no matter how distant a blood relative they may be.” Claire shuffled closer to Letitia as the others moved away to serve themselves drinks from a pitcher filled with an ominous looking red liquid. “The main reason that we were invited is because every year our business, Leoch Enterprises, provides funding to the drama department.”

“Leoch Enterprises, did you say?” Claire asked as Jamie joined them and handed her a glass.

“Yes, dear. Have ye heard of it?”

“Yes,” Claire nodded taking a sip, “when I was younger my father, Henry Beauchamp, worked for Leoch.”

“Oh,” Letitia nodded thoughtfully, “Henry and Julia Beauchamp. Wonderful, absolutely wonderful people. I remember spending some time with your mother at one of our annual events. I was so incredibly sad when they requested a transfer to one of our facilities outside of Scotland. But, of course when Gary, Laoghaire’s father, that is - he’s the head of Human Resources, ken? - told me you had expressed to Laoghaire that you were unhappy at school and that your parents were hesitant to say something, I understood. We Mackenzies understand that family must always come first...”

Letitia continued talking but Claire didn’t hear a word. It was almost as though the room had gone completely silent except for the thoughts running through her mind.  
  
"Please excuse me," Claire placed her glass on the closest flat surface, turned and walked away, her heart racing so loud she now couldn't hear anything at all. 

“Claire?” she felt Jamie put a hand on her arm just as she reached the foyer. “Talk to me. Is that no’ really what happened?”

“No,” she turned to him and shook her head, “ _No_ . I never discussed such a thing with Laoghaire or my parents. I was happy. _We_ were happy.”

“So what are ye saying? That Laoghaire made it up? That Laoghaire’s the one to be blamed for yer parent’s transfer?”

“I…” Claire nodded slowly. “Jamie, I think so.”

Suddenly Jamie grabbed her with both hands pulled her towards him.  
  
"Claire," he shook her gently and she looked up into his eyes. "I would never have dated her back then or even been friendly towards her if I had known. I swear to ye!"

Jamie waited for Claire to nod, indicating she understood, before pulling away and this time it was she who grabbed a hold of him.  
  
"Where are you going?"   
  
"To find Laoghaire. I need to have a word with that wicked wee bitch!"   
  
"No, Jamie, don’t." He looked down at her confusedly. "Stay with me. Please? We don't even know if what Letitia said is true. I just… I need time to _think_."   
  
"Aye, o' course, Claire." He enveloped her in a hug this time and held her tight. “You won’t be able to think straight will all this noise. Come on, let’s go outside.”

Claire followed Jamie out into the middle of the courtyard, breathing in the welcome cool fresh air as they walked. Jamie sat down on the edge of a concrete planter but she chose to remain standing, place her hands on her hips and look up at the stars in the night sky for a time.

“I don’t understand what would have made Letitia share such a story. It doesn’t make any sense,” Claire rubbed her hands up and down her arms suddenly wishing she had thought to grab her coat on the way out the door. “Perhaps she was mistaken?”

“Weel, it did happen a verra long time ago now,” Jamie nodded his head as he watched Claire start pacing back and forth, “and memories oft’ do change somewhat with each year that goes past.”

“I need to talk to Laoghaire. I can’t ask my parents what happened but maybe Laoghaire will be able to help.”

“Come on then,” Jamie stood and linked their hands once more. “We’ll go talk to her together.”

Claire gratefully let Jamie take the lead, following him back inside and through the many people still partying inside. 

“Jenny? Have ye seen Laoghaire anywhere?”

“Aye, she just went out the front doors,” Jenny indicated with a nod of her head and eyed them curiously as they passed by her.

“Jamie!“ Laoghaire’s eyes lit up at the sight of him coming through the door but steeled at the sight of the person behind him. “Claire.”

“Hello, Laoghaire,” Claire made a point of her smile being kind. She was determined to find out the truth but also committed to not making any judgements before she found it. “I hope you don’t mind but I have a couple of questions that you might be able to help answer.”

“Of course, what is it ye need help with?” Laoghaire took one last drag of her cigarette before dropping it the ground and crushing it under the toe of her shoe.

“I met Letitia Mackenzie earlier,” Claire took strength from Jamie who was standing tall by her side, “and she seemed to believe you knew the reason my father was transferred from Leoch's Inverness department to the one in Dublin.”

“Oh, aye? That was a verra long time ago now, Claire. I dinna ken if I remember all that well to be honest.”

“She said ye informed yer father that Claire was unhappy here and Henry wanted to ask for a transfer - do ye ken anything about that?” Jamie asked.

“Oh, yes, I do remember it now,” Laoghaire reached out and placed her hand kindly on Claire's arm, “ye were so unhappy here in Inverness, Claire, and I couldna bear to see it any longer so I mentioned it to my father. I was just doin’ ye a favour, Claire.”

“What are you talking about, Laoghaire? We hardly knew each other back then. We never interacted - you knew nothing about me!”

Laoghaire pulled her hand away and laughed. Not in a way that was joyous or heartfelt but something so far from it that Claire felt a shiver run up her spine.

“Oh, I kent ye verra well, Claire. I saw ye, aye? That night singing on stage wi’ Jamie. And I heard ye both talking and laughing in the hallway after. I kent then that ye were going to try and take what was rightfully mine. But I wasna ‘bout to let some sassenach witch walk in to North High and threaten my place here. So, I talked to Daddy and demanded that he reconsider the staffing here in Inverness. He never could say ‘no’ to me, ken?” Laoghaire chuckled to herself. “Aye… I was doing ye a favour, Claire.”

“A ‘favour'?” Claire stared at the woman, someone she had once seen as a fellow student and then a fellow colleague. Now all she could see was the person she really was under the facade. “Because of that transfer my parents _died_! Don't you feel even the tiniest bit of remorse that your actions led to my life changing forever?”

“Why would I?” A smirk spread across Laoghaire's face. “Did Jamie ever tell ye we dated? Senior year of high school, aye? Has he told ye all the things we did together?”

Claire started to raise her hand but stopped, curling into a fist and holding it steadfast by her side instead. 

“Now see here-” Jamie started before being interrupted by Laoghaire.

“I've been waiting for ye, Jamie. I always knew that one day ye would be mine. Let me know when her done with the sassenach whore, aye?”

“Ye willna talk about Claire that way, Laoghaire.” Jamie stepped forward, his solid form towering over Laoghaire. “And I will never be yours. We canna change what's happened in the past but we can decide the future. And when it comes to mine - hear me when I say - _you_ will not be part of it.”

Laoghaire looked up a Jamie, a mixture of concern and disbelief painted across her face, as though she had only just realised there were going to be consequences for her actions.

Claire stood completely still as Laoghaire turned and walked back inside. Only when Jamie gently squeezed her hand did she begin to move.

“I think I’ll head on home, Jamie. You’ll give my regards to everyone inside?”

“No.” Claire scrunched up her face and Jamie smiled. “What I mean to say is, don’t go home. Come on, Sassenach.”

Claire followed Jamie without question until they arrived at the parking lot and she realised Jamie’s intentions.

“Wait, where are we going? What about our jackets?”

“Dinna fash, I’ll text Jenny and ask her to take them home with her. I’m sure I’ve got some clean clothes in my truck and even a blanket, maybe.” Jamie unlocked the vehicle and held the passenger side door open for her to climb in. “I thought we could get away from here for a bit and there’s a place I have in mind fer us to go.”

The drive was quiet, nothing but the sounds of other cars passing theirs keeping them company as Jamie drove. Staring out the window, Claire watched the street lights go past until they all became a single blur. She blinked hard to clear her eyes and turned back to look out the front windshield and inspect the building they were pulling up to. The building was dark and the car park empty.

“North Inverness Rugby Club,” she read out loud as the headlights lit up the sign above the door. “This is the place you had in mind?”

“Aye,” Jamie nodded and pulled on the handbrake before turning off the engine. “Let me find ye something warm to wear and then I’ll show ye.”

Claire gratefully accepted the Edinburgh Alumni hoodie he handed her and pulled it over her head before stepping out into the cold air. It was so big it almost reached her knees but there was something comforting about it. Perhaps it was because it made her feel like she had been wrapped in a fleece blanket or, more likely, because it smelled so much like Jamie. She crossed her arms across her chest and Jamie wrapped one of his around her shoulders. 

Jamie led her around the side of the building and to a set of old metal stairs.

“Are you sure we’re allowed to be here, Jamie?” Claire paused with one foot on the step.

“Aye, I’m sure.” 

It was dark and the moon provided very little light through the clouds but climbing to the top of the stairs she could see up on the roof was a garden. Planters and pots adorned every surface she could see in the dim light and she was hesitant to move forward in case she tripped over something she couldn’t see.

“Hang on, I bet they’re still here somewhere.” Jamie stepped around her and reached under the nearest bench. “Aha!”

He pulled out two palm sized torches and switched them on. Only one worked but one provided plenty of light for the two of them.

“What is this place?” Claire placed her hand on top of Jamie’s and swept the flashlight from left to right. “It’s like a jungle up here.”

“That’s one way to describe it, aye,” Jamie chuckled. “Here you hold the torch - I think I can remember the path to take.”

Claire followed Jamie to a wooden bench seat located on the opposite side.

“So this is your private hideout?” Claire asked as she sat down and stretched her legs out in front of her.

“Weel, it’s no’ just mine,” Jamie ran his hand gently down the side of one of the plants on the stand in front of him, “but it’s certainly one of my favourites. I always seem to come back here when I need time to think. You would think Lallybroch would be a great place for time alone but believe me when I say that isna the case.”

“Does it help? Coming here to think?”

“Aye,” Jamie joined Claire on the bench seat. “When we had a championship game coming up. When my mam was sick. When I first got back to Inverness after my injury. I would come and sit here on this very bench. Sometimes… sometimes I dinna want to be the ‘rugby player’, ken? I just want to be… a person. One who cries, dreams, even screams sometimes.” Jamie reached out and gently turned Claire’s face so he could look into her eyes. “There’s no-one here that’s going to judge you, Claire. For anything you think or feel.”

Claire looked down at her hands and played with the dress ring on her right hand. 

“I wanted to slap her, you know,” she admitted after a while. “I’ve never felt that way before - about anyone.”

“I would have liked to have seen the look on her face if ye had, Sassenach.” Jamie nudged his shoulder against hers and Claire couldn't help but smile guiltily.

They sat in comfortable silence for a time, watching leaves shuffle in the soft wind.

“I can hear ye thinking from here, Sassenach. It helps to say it out loud, aye?”

“Do you… do you think this makes it my fault?”

“Make what your fault? Yer parent’s death?”

“Yes,” Claire took a deep breath leaned back to look up at the stars. She seemed to be doing that a lot tonight. “It’s because of me my father was transferred.”

“I ken ye’ve had quite a shock tonight, Claire, but what happened to yer family is not yer fault - I ken that too. Back then we were all still children. We didna have the power to make life-altering decisions, no’ even Laoghaire. The drunk driver who crashed into yer parent’s car is the one to blame for their deaths - ye told me so yerself.”

At Jamie’s words her chest loosened and a sob made its way free. 

“Come here, Sassenach.” Jamie pulled her into his arms and she buried her face into his shirt as she let the tears fall. 

She had no idea how long she cried in his arms. She hadn’t just been crying for her parents but for everything that had happened since then. The loss of Uncle Lamb. The ending of her relationship with Frank. The rollercoaster ride she had been on ever since she got on that plane to Scotland.

“Do ye feel better?” He asked after she finally quieted and relaxed in his arms.

“Yes,” Claire’s response was muffled and she lifted her head to look up at him. “Thank you, Jamie. And thank you for showing me your top-secret hiding place.”

“Any place of mine is yours, Claire,” he brushed a curl away from her face. “Always.”


	12. Just Wanna Be With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire and Jamie are invited to brunch at the Murray house before the big game.

Claire looked out through the car window at the blue double story house and back down to her phone to double check the address.

_ 17 43rd Street, Inverness. _

Claire glanced at the number 17 on the letter box one more time and turned off the ignition. When Jamie had informed her they had been invited to Jenny and Ian's house for brunch before the Grand Final on Saturday afternoon, she had been pleased. It was the first time she had officially been invited to a family gathering and despite everything that happened the night of the cast party, it sent a bit of a nervous thrill through her.

Feeling the need for some time and space to herself, she had declined Jamie’s offer to pick her up so as they could arrive together. Luckily for her, Jamie had understood. Despite not having seen each other since he took her home on Thursday night, they had been calling and texting each other constantly. Her favourite conversations were the ones where they would essentially talk about nothing: the pets they owned as children, a dream one of them might have had the night before, a funny story someone had once told them. 

Normally in times of stress she would retreat completely, admittedly even to the point of fleeing the country, but no matter how hard she tried she just couldn't stay away from Jamie. She was already aware she had been falling for him - and falling for him hard. But having him not only listen to her wants and needs but also have him stand beside her in dealing with Laoghaire, she was more sure than ever. 

Claire grabbed her bag and made her way out of the car and up the walkway. From the outside she could already tell this was more of a home than a house. Children's toys could be spotted here and there, and the front windows of the house were adorned with little hand prints. 

Claire knocked gently on the front door, just in case any of the little ones were mid-morning nap.

“Sassenach!” Jamie opened the door with a grin. “Come on in.”

Claire shifted the bundle in her arms and reached out to accept Jamie's open hand and followed him down the hallway into a large living room.

“Welcome, Claire,” Ian said kindly as he stood up from his position in a comfy looking armchair. “We're so glad ye could make it.”

“Aye, we are.” Jenny appeared through another doorway wiping her hands on her apron.

“Thank you both so much for inviting me,” Claire smiled at both of them. “Jamie told me that we weren't expected to bring anything but I couldn't bear to come completely empty handed. These are from my garden.”

Claire let go of Jamie's hand to present her gift to Jenny.

“Thank ye, Claire, come wi’ me into the kitchen and we'll find a vase to put them in.”

Laying the flowers on the center island, Jenny walked over to the cabinets near the sink and Claire rested herself against the island.

“My brother told me what happened at the cast party - about everything that happened with Laoghaire,” Jenny said breaking what was quickly becoming an awkward silence.

“Oh,” Claire said, somewhat taken aback. “Yes, it was… quite a shock. It’s been a lot to process the past few days.” 

Jenny pulled out a vase and moved to the sink to fill it. “Ye ken that when our mam passed I quit school to help care for my da and things at home?”

“Jamie told me,” Claire responded and waited patiently for Jenny to continue.

“I worrit about Jamie constantly. Mam’s death hit all of us hard but Jamie especially so. I kent he felt the weight of Da’s expectations and his responsibility in carrying on what Mam and Da’s dream for him had been. So, when he got his scholarship to college and then when on to play professionally, I only worrit all the more.” Jenny placed the vase on the bench and began to arrange the flowers. “He seemed a bit more content once he came home and started running Lallybroch after his injury. I had hoped that might have been the answer. But I could tell he was still restless. Still not quite content or whole, ye ken?”

Claire nodded slowly as Jenny looked over at her, then continued.

“Jamie isna one that should live life alone - I’ve always kent that. It’s why I set about trying to match him and Laoghaire. They’ve known each other since childhood and her family has ties with ours. She was the logical choice. And... if I am being completely honest, I did it because I knew if he got together with Laoghaire, it would keep him here. With us.”

“Of course, you’d want him to be near you - he’s family. Jamie’s shared some stories with me and I know how close you all are.”

“Yer kind to say so, Claire. Especially after the way I treated ye in the beginning. It was just you…”

“I’m the unstable choice?” Claire offered and Jenny nodded in agreement at her choice of words. “The one that could take him away, since I’m oh...what is it everyone likes to tease me about being? An outlander? A sassenach?”.   __

“A Sassenach ye may be, but the unstable choice? Nay. Although I may not know much about you, I ken how much my brother likes ye - loves ye, even. Ye make him whole, Claire. And that is enough for me.”

Claire stood motionless against the counter, tears welling in her eyes. “Jenny, I- I don’t know what to say.”

“I do. _Thank_ _you._ For making my brother smile not only more but also brighter than I have seen in a long time.” Jenny adjusted the flowers so they sat evenly in the vase. “Well, that is enough gabbing, aye? We best be getting back to the wild lot before they eat brunch without us. Can ye carry this tray into the dining room for me?”

“I’d be happy to.” 

Claire followed Jenny out of the kitchen and placed the platter of egg and bacon rolls on the table before taking a seat herself. The amount of food on the table seemed excessive. But looking at all the men filing into the dining room she supposed she shouldn’t underestimate them. Not yet, anyway. 

Claire caught Jamie’s eye and nodded curiously at Young Jamie who was unusually quiet, sitting upright in his chair and currently smoothing out his napkin on his lap.

Jamie leaned forward and explained in a hushed voice. “It’s the first time he’s been invited to sit at the table with all the adults, ken?”

“Ah,” Claire nodded her head. She could only imagine what an honour it must be to sit here at the dining table rather than at the round designated children’s table in the kitchen with Maggie, Kitty, Michael and Janet. 

Just as expected, brunch was an enjoyable affair. Long gone was the polite yet stilted conversation and badly disguised inquisitions Claire often faced whenever she was a guest in someone’s home. Since their talk in the kitchen earlier, Jenny had seemingly decided she was now one of the family and conversation between mouthfuls of food covered everything from rugby to the weather, from how the bake sale went the day before to what Robert’s plans were while we was home.

Before long the platters in front of them were cleared and their conversation was interrupted by the thunderous patter of feet into the dining room.

“Is it time?? Is it time to go??” Michael asked as he grabbed onto his mother’s sleeve.

“Yeah! Is it time to go??” Wee Janet chimed in behind him just as excitedly.

“Aye,” smiled Jenny checking the watch on her wrist, “it’s time to go. Go and tell yer sisters to put their shoes on and grab their jackets.”

The twins ran off excitedly and Claire couldn’t help but chuckle. She turned to Jamie who was also smiling. “Let’s take my car, shall we?”

 

\-----

 

Claire pulled up next to Jenny and Ian's truck to see Fergus and an older man approaching the arriving party.

“Come on, Sassenach, let me introduce ye to Murtagh.”

“How is it possible that I haven’t met everyone already?”

Jamie laughed as they each climbed out of her little hatchback. “Just wait until we host one of our infamous family gatherings at Lallybroch. Today is  _ nothing _ in comparison.”

Normally the thought of attending a large family gathering - one even larger than the one she attended at the Murray House - would make her nervous and somewhat sad. Despite her best intentions she would always end up thinking about her lack of family. She had met Frank's relatives of a number of occasions but they had never felt… warm or welcoming. They had always seemed like the kind of people who, unlike the Fraser family, were held together by blood rather than choice.  _ This, _ however, is something she could very much see herself being a part of.

“Murtagh, let me introduce ye to Claire Beauchamp.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Murtagh,” Claire smiled and held out her hand in greeting.

“Aye, the English lass I’ve been hearin’ sae much about,” Murtagh shook Claire’s hand and chuckled as she blushed. “Ye seemed to make quite an impression on Fergus recently.”

“Och, leave her be ye gomeral!” Robert came up and put his arm around Murtagh shoulders in what might be considered a one armed hug. “Ignore him, Claire! We all ken he’s only here for the food Jenny’s brought him and Fergus, aye?”

“Did someone mention food?” Fergus asked, appearing out of nowhere causing everyone to laugh. 

“I’ll catch ye all after the game, aye?” said Robert letting go of Murtagh.

“Alright man,” Jamie slapped a hand on his little brother’s shoulder. 

As Robert made his way over to his friends the rest of the group made their way up into the stands as the school sports anthem played over the loudspeakers.

__ Wildcats sing along  
_ Yeah, you really got it goin' on  
_ __ Wildcats in the house

__ Everybody say it now  
_ Wildcats everywhere  
_ __ Wave your hands up in the air

__ That's the way we do it  
_ Let's get to it  
_ __ Time to show the world

Claire smiled listening to the students throughout the crowd sing along. She couldn’t help but wish she had have had the chance to spend her entire high school years here. The game itself might not have ever become a favourite of hers but the atmosphere was something she could easily get used to.

Jamie stepped aside and waited for Claire to take a seat next to Rachel before taking a seat on her other side. 

“Is this yer first time attending a grand final, Claire?” Rachel asked as she settled her bag under her seat.

“Yes,” Claire chuckled, “that obvious am I?”

“Ye’ve got that look on yer face is all, the kind that show just how excited ye are. Dinna fash,” Rachel added as Claire blushed, “ye fit in with all the parent’s here today. We’re all verra excited to see the boys win!”

Jamie, Ian, Willie, Murtagh and Fergus all stood to yell and cheer as each team took their starting positions on the field. 

“WHAT TEAM? TIGERS!”

The first half started smoothly. Claire still didn’t know any more about rugby than she did before returning to Scotland but it was incredibly fun to watch all the same.

“What’s it like?” Claire asked.

“Hmm?” Jamie turned to look at her for half a second before turning back to the game.

“Playing? On the field, I mean.”

“I dinna ken how to describe it,” Jamie rubbed the palm of his hand over mouth and chin taking the time to think over his answer. “It’s… incredible. There’s truly nothing like it. For 90 minutes it’s like nothing else exists. Just you, your teammates and your opponents. You have no worries, no thoughts, about anything other than the game. Winning is neither here nor there, it’s just a bonus at the end, really.”

“Do you miss it?”

“I did at first. But not because of the game. After what happened with Da, more than anything I wished for a way to distract myself and being a full-time athlete is a great way to do that. A guilt free way. As I came to terms with what happened and put all my time and energy into building Lallybroch Farms I missed it less and less. A scrimmage with the boys every now and again is plenty enough for me.”

Their conversation ended with the sound of the siren and a round of applause from the crowd.

“Jamie, you coming?” Willie called.

“Aye!” Jamie called back before turning to Claire. “I’m going down to the fence line with the boys. Do ye want to come with?”

“No, that’s okay. I’m happy to sit here and people watch.”

“Alright, send me a text if ye need anything while I’m down there.”

People watching quickly turned into Jamie watching, not that she would ever admit such a thing. It was too much fun watching him laughing and smiling with his brothers. Eventually she pulled her eyes away and looked out at other people mingling below. 

Claire stilled at the sight of Laoghaire. She hadn't seen her since the events that took place at the cast party on Thursday night. On Friday, she had kept to the Nurse's Station and left campus as soon as possible, even though it meant she had to forgo the bake sale. She really shouldn't have been surprised to see her. Laoghaire was still a North High faculty member and very much a long term part of this community, after all. Still, two days seemed like hardly enough time to come to terms with what happened 15 years ago.

“He needs a woman, not a lassie.”

“Pardon?” Claire turned to find Murtagh by her side, blatantly looking where Claire had been just seconds before. 

“Laoghaire,” Murtagh nodded his head towards the woman who was now walking away towards the concession stand, “will be a girl until she's 50.  I've been around long enough to ken the difference very well.”

Much to Claire’s bewilderment Murtagh simply turned to his other side and started a conversation with someone else.

Had she been that obvious? Was he aware of what had gone down at the cast party? Or was this an opinion he held long before she had arrived back in Scotland? Murtagh had certainly left her with more questions than answers. 

What she did know for certain was that it was time for her to stop letting others dictate her path in life, not Frank and certainly not Laoghaire. For too long she had been walking through life cautiously, desperate to protect herself from any more heartache than she had already suffered. But look where that had gotten her. She was on the run from a broken relationship, a fraught workplace, a life that she had ultimately created for herself. Now she had stumbled unintentionally onto something great yet she was sitting here even more hesitant than ever. 

The second half turned out to be even more exciting than the first. Judging by the crowd it was the best kind of game to be expected. Claire watched Jamie and his two brothers still gathered by the fence line. She couldn't make out what they were yelling but she could guess all the same. 

The Highland Tigers were down 29 - 33 with 2 minutes to go. Claire and everyone else remaining in the stands watched with bated breath as the Tigers continued to push down the field.

“COME ON, TIGERS!!” Someone in front of them yelled.

Rachel squealed and grabbed a hold of Claire's arm as Robbie took possession of the ball.

“YES!!! GO ROBBIE!!” This time it was Jenny yelling, clutching a still sleeping Young Ian to her chest. “RUN!!”

Robbie dove across the line and the entire stand erupted in cheers, only becoming louder after the sound of the final siren. The Tigers had won 34 - 33.

The radio came over the speakers and both students and family members alike stormed the field to congratulate the team with hugs and pats on the back. It was obvious both teams were exhausted but adrenaline was keeping the Tigers upright and smiling.

__ All I want to do is be with you  
__ Be with you  
_ There's nothing we can't do  
_ __ Just want to be with you, only you

“Go on, lass,” Murtagh nudged her gently with his elbow and nodded his head towards the field. “What are ye waitin’ for?”

“Look after my purse?”

“Aye, I hold her purse if that's what it takes. Now get gone.”

__ No matter where life takes us  
__ Nothing can break us apart  
_ I just want to be with you  
_ __ Just be with you

Laughing, Claire made her way down the steps looking for Jamie from her vantage point while she still could. Luckily the 6’4” redheaded man was easily spotted amongst the crowd.

__ You know how life can be  
__ It changes overnight  
__ It's sunny then raining, but it's alright  
_ A friend like you  
_ __ Always makes it easy

Rather than making her way through the people gathered around the gate, Claire jumped the fence and ran onto the field.

__ I know that you get me  
__ Every time  
__ Through every up, through every down  
_ You know I'll always be around  
_ __ Through anything you can count on me

“Jamie!” she yelled as she ran towards him.

“Claire! Did ye see Robbie-”

Claire wrapped her arms around his neck and silenced his words with a kiss. Not the sweet and simple kind that you might expect for a first kiss but one that expressed she was feeling in that moment. Happiness. Love. Certainty.

__ All I want to do is be with you  
__ Be with you  
_ There's nothing we can't do  
_ __ Just want to be with you, only you

Jamie wrapped his arms around her tightly and responded in kind. The crowd surrounding them fell away and it was just the two of them making up for lost time.

__ No matter where life takes us  
__ Nothing can break us apart  
_ (You know it's true)  
_ __ I just want to be with you

Claire pulled back to look up at him with a smile and and tilted her head to the side. “What  _ is _ this song?” 

“Och, just a song from a musical film that all the kids like and… I dinna mind it too much either.” Jamie lifted her into his arms and swung her around, laughing. 

_ I just wanna be with you. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has read and commented on this story! We are so incredibly grateful! This is the end of the original storyline but we love this story so much we do have Parts 2 and 3 sketched out. But first, we have a number of other one-shots and multi-chapter stories we want to write (and we're not confident enough to write multiple stories all at once so one at a time it is). J & A x

**Author's Note:**

> Loved it? Hated it? Please let us know what you think - we love feedback!


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